Undone
by beatrueheart
Summary: Cameron Morgan. Zachary Goode. Cammie appears perfect. Zach has a reputation to keep up. Can Cammie learn to dance with danger or will her training and instincts keep her from accepting love? Can Zach show her how? Is Lana Del Rey perfection? I think yes. Therefore... Zammie.
1. Chapter 1

On the sofa, where we lay

I wanna stay inside all day

And it's cold outside, again

(Sofa by Ed Sheeran)

I was 5.

They say I was child prodigy. They say I was born for this life. They say a lot of things 'bout me.

So I hide instead of facing the lights. They'll never notice.

I was curled up on the couch, my legs tucked up to my chest and arms wrapped around my knees. Listening. The silence of the house a familiar pulse to my ears.

Then she's home. Home with me. The child in me peeks through my mind, hoping for her love. I gracefully climb off the seat and run the meet her. My feet grace the floor like a light wind.

Something's wrong. I see it in her eyes, the only place even the most fully trained operative can't fully control. I feel it in the air, like the scent of rain on the horizon, and I feel the calm before the storm, knowing it would be the first of many sleepless nights to come.

2 words. 7 letters. Enough to bring my world crashing down on my fragile shoulders.

"He's dead," she said.

The numbness in my mother's voice was the worst part. Consuming, like a vacuum, sucking away my joy and leaving me spinning. She could have cried. She could have screamed. She could have planned revenge on the world.

Instead she sat, quiet and empty, an imprint of a once mighty woman.

She sank down next to me on the couch. Her hand moved methodically through my hair as my shoulders shook with repressed tears.

_A spy never shows emotion. Rule number 1._

I was empty, lying on the sofa, waiting for the pain to pass, like a fleeting shock. I was waiting, deep inside my soul, to wake up form a bad dream. Waiting to wake up and find my father there, swinging me around in his arms.

_Camster, you've gotta be strong for me. Can you do that, sweetheart?_

Was this just a test? I looked to the door of our apartment. Waiting for the handle to move and a familiar pair of feet to appear.

Nothing.  
I lay on the sofa, not moving. Not willing to accept anything as the truth.

I lay, glued to my position. Rooted to the spot by the immobilizing pain that weighed down my tiny heart and mind.

On the sofa, where we lay

I wanna stay inside all day

And it's cold outside, again


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you to the 3 amazing people who reviewed my last story. You made me happy. Enjoy this- it's short but it has Ed Sheeran, so your argument is invalid. **

We could fly to Berlin, Tokyo or Jamaica

We can go where you want

Say the word and I'll take ya

(Sofa by Ed Sheeran)

I looked out of the plane window at the darkening sky.

Below, the ocean lay still, deepening the silence of the night. The cockpit of my mother's private plane was still.

And she was still too. Staring ahead, mouth drawn, and lines tightening her beautiful face. Still grieving, but still moving, relying on her training to pull her through. I sat in the co-pilot's chair, absorbing every detail, trying to connect the dots of an unsolvable puzzle.

Dad was dead.

Mom knew. I knew.

Innocence is truly bliss.

So, we were leaving. Moving onto a new life. Running from the inevitable. Trying to leave behind the pain of a loving family, shattered.

After the first shock had worn off, my mother had gathered her belongings, scooped me into her arms and rushed to our private airfield.

Now we were heading… I supposed it was England, due to the amount of fuel left in the tank and from there…. Well

"Cammie," her voice broke the silence. "Go to sleep. We'll be there in the morning."

I fell asleep to the sound of my mother's quiet sobs.

We could fly to Berlin, Tokyo or Jamaica

We can go where you want

Say the word and I'll take ya

**If you haven't been able to tell, I love Ed Sheeran, and books, (I am destined to become a cat lady, I know), I can fangirl over either all day, so PM me and we can be best friends for ever. **


	3. Chapter 3

Touch down

Like a seven four seven

Stay out and we'll live forever now

(Autumn Leaves by Ed Sheeran)

"Mummy, I miss him"

She was by my side, holding me to her chest and stroking my blonde hair.

She murmured words into my hair, singing in her beautiful voice.

3 weeks. 3 weeks since he had held me in his strong arms and hugged me goodbye. 3 weeks since my world had flipped upside down.

"Mum, will you stay with me?" I beg. "Stay forever?"

Silence.

Tears fill her eyes as she looks into my face. They spill down her cheeks, like liquid diamonds and run down to splash into my hair.

"I'll always be with you, even when I'm not there. We'll always be together. Don't you worry Cam." She said, voice shaking with emotion.

Satisfied, I burrow into her warm arms and fall asleep.

I dream of my family.

Touch down

Like a seven four seven

Stay out and we'll live forever now

**So don't worry, the action will pick up very soon! I don't want to bore you to death. Do you like this story thingie, or is it too weird? Can you guys understand what I am trying to say/what's happening or is it really confusing? Reviews help me change stuff, so tell me what I am doing wrong. Thanks for reading. Love**


	4. Chapter 4

I don't know when I lost my mind

Maybe it was every time

That you said, you said, you said

That I miss you.

(Miss You by Ed Sheeran)

My phone rings in the still house. Mother's gone. Again.

I answer.

"I miss you," she says.

She's been gone for weeks and weeks. I've been alone for weeks and weeks. But I'm used to it now. I'm older now.

Ever since Dad died, she took on extra missions, trying to distract herself from the pain. My face reminds her of his.

I guess there were worse things in life.

Or maybe not.

I understand why she moves on now. It's too painful to simply sit and stare at the pictures, to painful to think of the past and what could have been.

But, she's still not here to comfort me when I cry. She's still not here when the nightmares catch up to me in my dark room. She's not here when I need her.

The line goes dead as I drop the phone.

Each time she calls, I remember what it was like to see her smile. Each time I feel my heart being squeezed then torn from my chest. Each time she say's goodbye, I feel as though I could reach out, to comfort her just my holding her hand.

Each time she hangs up, I know I've lost my mind, but I can't seem to find it.

Each time she leaves, I hold onto the memories, thinking of the moment when Dad last left, and hoping to see her again too. Those nights, I cry the most. But she'll never know. I'm too strong to break.

I don't know when I lost my mind

Maybe it was every time

That you said, you said, you said

That I miss you.

**Plot Summary: So after Cammie's dad dies, Cammie and her mom leave to a new life. But Cammie's mom is still very sad, and tries to drown out her sorrows by working really hard, therefore she is often gone. Cammie feel lonely and alone without both her parents. She worries her mom will become MIA. **

**Thank you to those who review and read my stories. It means a lot. Thanks darlings! **


	5. Chapter 5

There is no peace that I've found so far

The laughter penetrates my silence

"Set The Fire To The Third Bar"

(feat. Martha Wainwright by Snow Patrol)

From the helicopter, I looked down upon the sprawling lands of Gallagher Academy.

I was finally home. Gallagher. I'd moved on since my father's death and mother's disappearance. Changing from house to apartment to beach front villa. Each place more expensive and secluded than the last.

Money? I had loads of it.

Talent? I was the greatest teenage spy on record.

Fame? Does the Chameleon ring a bell? Yeah, well that's me.

I had it all really. Or did I?

I reached my rooms. The first of my friends to arrive. The suite was quiet, empty and still, a ghost of days gone by.

Black hair, shinning jewels, Macey appears in a whirl of snobby attitude and designer clothing. She drops the bags at the door, and with it them her cover, as she rushes gracefully to my side.

Then Bex, with her cocoa hair, wafting in the smell of vanilla, joins Macey and we smile and remember old times.

We hear Liz approach from the outside. Her southern charm precedes her with an "Oppsie Daisy", as she knocks off the Monet on the wall.

Reunited. Together.

My family. The ones who never left.

The ones I can protect form the darkness of the outside.

We laugh, and laugh again. Smiles. Love.

Friends.

There is no peace that I've found so far

The laughter penetrates my silence

**Basically, Cammie's Dad is dead and her mom is not in her life as much. So she moves around. She comes to Gallagher for her Junior year and is excited to see her best friends, Macey, Bex and Liz. Her friends become her sort of "family she never had". Understand? Good.**

**Here is a story:**

**Once upon a time there was a little girl who wrote a story and put it on a website. The thing she wanted most in the entire world was for someone to review her story so she could get better! In the end, when nobody reviewed, she stayed in her room eating cookie dough and listening to Ed Sheeran.**

**I have no connection to the above story, just thought you might want to read it. On a totally unrelated subject: REVIEW! thanks **


	6. Chapter 6

And I don't get waves of missing you anymore,

They're more like tsunami tides in my eyes

Never getting dry,

(UNI by Ed Sheeran)

Monday of the first term. First day of Junior year. New starts.

I pulled on my uniform as I covered the dark circles under my eyes with concealer. _A good spy never shows weakness._

Down the stairs, 3 minutes 46 seconds early for breakfast. _A good spy is always early._

Chatting with the new girls, interacting with the old. _A good spy integrates into society._

The speech starts, but I keep my attention focused on the reaction of the crowd. I already knew Professor Buckingham's announcement. _A good spy always does her homework._

"I am pleased to announce an exchange between the junior classes of Blackthorne and Gallagher academy, starting 2 weeks from the start of term," she say, dramatically.

Silence. Then whispers rise from the sea of shocked spies. I turn to Bex, pretending to ask about Blackthorne. _A good spy always reacts like the crowd._

Inside I'm calculating. Planning my next move.

Next to me, Tina whispers about cute boys.

Some things never change.

Some things, like the feeling I get when I see the word Blackthorn. Like the memories that come flooding back, of sleeping in a too big t-shirt, like the Uncle I never really had, Joe. Daddy, telling me to grow up stronger then those Blackthorn boys, then laughing as I showed him my progress.

It all comes back, shattering my preparation. I fight to keep my tears in check. I smile at Tina, inside screaming.

I leave the table, excusing myself for more pineapple.

I don't come back.

They won't notice.

And I don't get waves of missing you anymore,

They're more like tsunami tides in my eyes

Never getting dry,

**To Be Perfectly Clear: **So basically, Cammie knows who Joe is (it was explained to her that he was her father's best friend) but has never met him. And the T shirt is referring to Cammie using her dad's old shirt to sleep in for pj's.

**I feel like this story is getting kinda long and depressing. Never fear, it gets better! I have already written 16 chapters, because I got so obsessed with this project, I got carried away. Oh well :) **

**As always, the annoy person in me says... Review. **

**(I feel like a teacher) **

**If I was nicer would you guys review? **

**How bout this: I love you almost as much as I love Ed Sheeran and we will be best friends forever if you simply review... Oh what the heck, nobody reads this anyways... Im just gonna go away now.. Love ya'll**


	7. Chapter 7

My mind is racing

With the picture I'm painting

And my belly's sick to its stomach

(Miss You by Ed Sheeran)

We pack.

Macey surprises us with the number of clothes she can fit into 1 suitcase. (29 shirts, 30 various pairs of pants/shorts, make-up and other accessories)

Bex debates the number of weapons to bring. (She settles on the basic set of knives, a gun and various other toys)

Liz frets over her computers and wires.

I sit on my bed. I've already packed.

We are the only ones prepared for the shock of Buckingham's announcement. It seems summer break has dulled the senses of the other girls. They didn't even check for the bugs planted on their blazers, none the less hack into the schools files.

Back in our room we listen to the conversations.

Meanwhile, Tina gloats, Eva worries about make-up and Anna despairs about the competition.

If only they knew the truth.

Assassins. That's what these boys are.

The jealousy starts up, all too familiar. If I had just been born a boy, vengeance….. It would have been so easy, tempting even, to get revenge on my father's death and mother's disappearances. So easy, like an effortless brush pass. Revenge would have become my most honed instinct, teaching me to act, and react, with no thought of feelings.

But I'm a girl. Expected to be confined by simple stereotypes, and rules. I am a lady, gentle and delicate. The Blackthorn boys are all the same; rude, arrogant, and biased. They never would have expected a girl to be capable of such "masculine" deeds. As if. Death seems like such a simple journey compared to life, many roads all leading to one gate.

The bitter anger makes me weak, it makes my eyes strain to hold back the tears. I will be strong. I will not let my hate blind me. Power comes with acceptance of things that are, then working for things that could be. I will be powerful.

My anger is swept up in cold, hard logic.

I'm determined. I am strong.

Never underestimate a Gallagher Girl.

Never underestimate me.

My mind is racing

With the picture I'm painting

And my belly's sick to its stomach

**So in this chapter, we basically learn that Cammie sometimes wishes she went to Blackthorn too. Which, is understandable, considering her past. Finally, those boring and creepy chapters make sense. **

**Thank you thank you thank you to the awesome people who ****reviewed. (It was really nice when I came home from track to see all the new reviews).**

**Sorry my chapters are short, they get longer, I just like experimenting with the way I write, which is kinda a weird style. I will try to write more!**

**Lastly, well, I'm not even going to say it... Maybe I am. **

**Review. Loveies **


	8. Chapter 8

Skeletons, remind me, where I have been

Skeletons, remind me, what could have been

So close that door, I'll seal the floors

Then skeletons come out to play

When my mind wonders and memories fade

(Skeletons by Nina Nesbitt)

The others sit around me in the private plane, anxious and excited, worried about the reception at Blackthorn.

I sit, and wait for it all to be over, wait to find the nearest passageway to crawl into, wait for the spotlight to fade. _New always equals noticeable._

Touchdown, we disembark and head towards the barbed-wire premise of intimidation begins. I stand behind Macey, hoping her shadow will cover me as we enter the main dinning room.

Smooth, unreadable, my face is instantly captured by hundreds of eyes. They are staring, at me. Me, why me?

Why was I born with a supermodel's grace? Why was I born with legs that catch stares? Why was I born with blonde hair that falls perfectly down my back in a golden waterfall? And why can't I hide from myself, the one thing that always catches up.

A different girl, from a different life would have loved the attention. Not this girl.

For me, attention was like a disease, plaguing my body, and leaving me crippled, center stage. All eyes watching.

The stares follow me to the center of the room, where I immerse myself in the crowd of girls, trying to hide from the eyes.

The boys stare, seeing only the outside. None see the inside, all to busy calling dibs to x-ray my heart.

A man calls the crowd of goggling boys to attention.

"Sir, yes sir". They shape up quickly, fear evident in their postures.

Joseph Solomon materializes from inside the crowd of boys, to greet the new visitors, only proper for the head of Blackthorn to do so.

My insides squeeze into a hard knot. No amount of untangling can un-tie it, as my heart sinks to the floor. So many memories.

Joe looks at the girls, composed and aloof, sticking to our cover until the end. Posh princess all lined in a row, waiting for the dashing young princes to rescue us. Not happening.

His eyes x-ray each one, with the practiced eyes of a lifetime spy.

Brown eyes meet blue.

Recognition, love, sadness and fear all fill his eyes as he stares into my face. His eyes remind me of long forgotten pictures and my father, hugging this man's shoulders.

He moves on. _A good spy never stays for too long._

But I know he will be coming back.

Skeletons, remind me, where I have been

Skeletons, remind me, what could have been

So close that door, I'll seal the floors

Then skeletons come out to play

When my mind wonders and memories fade

**Basically, Cammie sees Joe for the first time (she had never seen him before). She knows it is him from her father's pictures. Matthew and Joe were best friends growing up at Blackthorn. Joe recognizes Cammie, but can't make it obvious that he knows her. We also learn that Cammie is very pretty, though she wishes she wasn't (basically the opposite of every single girl on the face of the planet, which comes into play... later). **

**Dear me I almost forgot, thanks for reviewing... and thanks for reading! **

**I'll make you a deal: you review my story, I review yours. Deal, shake, REVIEW! (Tell me if you really want me to review your story, and I will) **


	9. Chapter 9

My voice is mute

Not to be heard

(Undone by Ed Sheeran)

An equation to solve the Chameleon: New place plus new rooms equals new hiding places.

I glide through the halls, silent, unnoticed, constantly searching for a sanctuary. I'm ghostly in my sports bra and shorts, sleep never coming to my restless mind. So I move searching for anyplace, really, to be alone and sheltered from the world.

When I'm alone I can forget. Forget the rules, the the shifting colors and the endless games. Forget the lies and the memories.

Left wall, top air vent, right turn, strait corridor, trapdoor. Then, my secret passageway appears. It has gone unoticed by all Blackthorn Boys, only a minuscule difference between bricks. I pull out the loose brick and pull a lever, while a sliding door appears to my left.

Darkness, confinement, solitary. My favorite.

I listen to the sound of my heart, reminding me I'm still alive, deep down. It pounds like a sprinters feet, loud to the inpenatrable silence that is solitude.

I listen to the sound of my breathing and remember that each moment has potential. Potential only to be unlocked by me Each breath, reminding me of the days gone past. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale, the inexorable pattern of life.

I listen to the music of the water, dripping from a faulty ceiling and remember the springs' first rain, nature. I'm a deadman in a world of the living. Unnatural, an enigma.

I listen to the world, content to sit, and the world passes me by, ignoring my tiny voice in the sea of swirling voices. I've tried screaming, yet my voice is mute, not to be heard.

Relaxation comes at a heavy price.

The door swings open, and I sit, like a deer in the headlights, as a boy appears. There's no escaping once you're alone.

Was it so much to ask, to sit alone, to feel the peace solitude gives me?

Apparently so.

He looks at me, I know he sees my features; I know he sizes up my beauty, enjoying me shirtless in the darks, labels me, and files his information categorically into his brain. I've seen it all before. _See, record, analyze._ Every good spy know. People our the business, information is our game.

I stand up as he enters, unashamedly intruding upon the fraction of the universe that held me but a few short moments ago. The one sliver of my life I could tough and control.

I know he watches as I walk down the passageway, and I feel his eyes staring after me long after I've disappeared.

No words. But I know his type.

Boys, their all the same.

His face flashes in my mind. Green eyes. Well cut features. And a smirk etched onto his lips, a permanent remberance his arrogant ways. His face showed no remorse, no sympathy. The cold face of an assassin.

Sonething in his eyes reminded me of myself.

I return to my rooms. The green eyed boy haunts my dreams like a shadow consuming the few hours of rest I managed to steal from the sands of times.

Sleep comes. My mind fades away.

My voice is mute

Not to be heard

**Basically, I finally figured out what's gonna happen in this story. Be happy for me. Now if I could just sort out my life... Haha**

** How are all of you?**

**I'd just like to say the biggest thanks to all who read and reviewed. It seriously made my entire day, even overshadowing school (that wasnt very hard). Love and Review**

**(You know I really used to hate reading all the notes that were like Review please... Then I published my own story. Haha yes I know I'm a ****hypocrite, you don't have to tell me)**

**Good day to ya'll**


	10. Chapter 10

My mind is a warrior,

My heart is a foreigner,

My eyes are the colour of red like a sunset,

(Grade 8 by Ed Sheeran)

They say his name is Zachary Goode. That green eyed boy from the night before.

Back in our room, CIA files claim he is the closest descendant of Catherine Goode, they say he was born July 17th, they say he his one of the best. Liz studies the files, Macey stares at his face, while Bex cracks her knuckles. I pace around, like a general on the field, plotting my next move.

He's good.

But not good enough. Because he has left his mark on the world. _A good spy treads lightly._

Tracing footsteps is my speciality.

I remember his smirking face. My anger sparks like a forest fire. Soon the blaze is raging. I channel all my hurt, loneliness, sadness, anger and frustration into the fire and watch as it grows into a flaming wall around my heart, protecting me. I move on, push away my anger. I'm good at moving forward. New starts.

Lessons begin at our new home. P&E. Bex races to our room and drags me down to the gym in excitement, prepared to kick-ass. Coach yells: Push-ups, sit-ups, pull-ups, 5 mile warm-up jog.

We hit the floor. 100 pushups, 100 sit-ups. Six packs showing. 100 pull ups arm muscles quivering. 4 minute miles, heavy panting.

Girls beat boys. Boys get angry. Pre-school all over again.

Fighting time. Boys smirk. Girls grin.

We fight. Coach pairs up fighters. Girls v. Girls. Boys v. Boys. The coach appraises the Gallager girls with renewed respect. At least one person seems to have the right idea around here. His grin should have warned the Blackthorn Boys, all too busy grunting like primates to notice than maniacal smiles appearing on the face of each girl. New pairs, a tournament of the sexes.

Joe slips into the gym so quietly only I register his presence. He stands in the background, watching and waiting. His eyes follow my movements, pride in his eyes. I focus in on the present. I've determined Joe means me no harm.

The fight ensues. Block, parry, dodge, swing,kick, flip.

Finally a use for such long beautiful legs. I dispatch 2 boys with a kick to the head.

Finally a use for such long silky hair. It fans about and catches in the eyes of a Blackthorn boy who got to close.

Finally a use for a small body. I flip and spin gracefully, the years of ballet intermixing into the thrill of the fight.

Perhaps such a body is meant for the field. Blackthorn boys disagree. Their catcalls suggest I'm better used in bed.

For those boys, I prepare a special surprise.

The Blackthorn boys have no qualms about attacking girls. In fact, their strength and size presents a challenge. Challenge accepted.

The fighting's done. The scores calculated.

Macey, Bex, Cammie: champions.

Blackthorn boys: angry

We watch our backs for the rest of the day. A surprise dagger in the gut never goes amiss in a school full of killers.

Boy stare, we ignore.

Zachary takes defeat poorly. He sulks for the rest of the day, as the other Blackthorn boys ask how he lost to a bunch of sissy girls. He punches their faces, and they leave him alone.

I smirk as I see his outburst. Joe notes my smirk and sends me an approving glance. I'm starting to like him more and more. He at least understand girls too can aspire to greatness.

Never underestimate a Gallagher girl.

Back in our room, we laugh together, replaying the day back in our minds. Lessons: cake, fighting: a dance, looks: all Macey approved.

Laughing, I fall back on my bed as Bex re-enacts a particularly amusing exchange between her and the boy Grant. Contentment washes through me like an exploded dam, crashing though my body. It shocks me, a new sensation. A good sensation, peaceful, relieving. I sit up, shot full of happiness. The girls look surprised as I spin around the floor dancing like a drunk, and singing in my clear, beautiful voice. It's been ages since I've been happy. Their looks of surprise and amusement only raise me higher, seeking the peak of my happiness high. Their smiles reach their eyes as I spin and tumble to the floor, laughing.

Once I start, I can't stop. Laughing is the therapy no money can buy, and one that eludes most attempts to find it. Once tears are streaming down my face, my problems seem as distant as the milky way.

I fall back to bed and the nightmares can't hurt me tonight.

My mind is a warrior,

My heart is a foreigner,

My eyes are the colour of red like a sunset

**Thank you to the few reviews which I have. They are all really nice and inspire me to write more! Sorry my chapters are so short. It just never works when I try to write really long chapters. **

**Improving is only going to happen if you tell me what I'm doing wrong. Just think of the most annoying thing about my writing, then tell me. I swear, the more mean, the better cuz then I can actually improve!**

**Any cool weekend plans? Have fun!**

**PS, I broke 900 words this chapter. Be proud**

**Love**


	11. Chapter 11

But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start

(Arms by Christina Perri)

New day, new nightmares. All previous happiness is swallowed up by the passing of time. Days pass in the blink of an eye.

I wake from the brief sleep I got and feel the memories chasing me. I run. Running away, as fast as I can.

Down to the gym, alone in the stillness of the 2 am air. The sleeping Blackthorn boys behind their doors are unaware of my presence. Cameras can't catch me, I dodge and duck their sweeping eyes.

The door is unlocked, the lights are on. I sneak quietly inside. Behind me, the door closes without a sound.

Thud. Thud. Thud.

He's already here. Zachary Goode. Boxing. Shirtless. Sweaty. He hasn't seen me yet, clinging to the shadows, but….. Too late, I was too careless. _Tiny mistakes lead to big failures._

He looks up and our eyes meet. He's… different somehow. Seeing him in a different light for the first time brings out his insecurity. His eyes seem less guarded, like fractured glass. Behind them I feel the storm he's controlling. I remember the same feeling. Times spent alone, wishing to close down my mind.

I'm not the only one with a painful past.

He throws more punches, determined to ignore me. I feel the tension in the air. He's still mad about the P&E championship. 2 can play this game, Mr. Goode.

I study his form as he continues to pound the bag. He's stronger than me, gifted with strength a girl can never hope to injustice... He relies on strength, rather than form, his main weakness. Further evidence of his arrogance.

Thud. Thud. Thud.

He punches, kicks, retreats, practicing combinations. I stand and watch, my mind captivated by the possibilities. If he would just shorten his uppercuts…..

Instinctively, I move in and parry his punch. In his surprise, he stops punching. I tell him my suggestions.

He glares at me.

But when we resume fighting I notice he uses my ideas, and he is able to (almost) land a hit on my jaw. He grins, noticing the improvement.

Jab, cross, hook, uppercut. Right kick, roundhouse, dodge. We fight tirelessly. I forget about the nightmares, the anguish, the loneliness, in my concentration. We dance around the room in a whirl of blows and kicks.

He is not so bad. Once his form is improved, his strength and technique are formidable. I like a good challenge.

I pinned him to the ground.

Once I let him up, he stares. Remembering what I am wearing, I look down at my finely toned body, evidence of years spent training. It all shows in my spandex short shorts and t-shirt. Assassin or not, teenage boys will always be boys, I sigh.

I move to the bleachers and start running stairs, high knees, up and down, up and down. Meanwhile, he stares.

The silence is really getting to me, something which has never happened before. Why does this school give me more emotional experience than all my years at Gallagher combined? Boys make girls become girls.

I open my mouth to speak. Zach, still watching me, notices my indecision and smirks.

I dust my self off and exit the gym, crawling into a boy-free secret passage way, to hide away from Mr. Smirk.

But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start

**This chapter is my fav so far! What about you guys? So tired, if spelling is bad, please pardon my soul. School is seriously hell on earth. Dying...****  
**

**Kidding, I'm still here. **

**Is this story kinda a love/hate story?. Either you like it or hate it? I know lots of people like it (oh stop, your making me blush), but some don't. Opinions? **

**PS. here is Zach. a different kind of Zach, but Zach none the less. Enjoy him- he's shirtless, You're welcome. **

**Thanks for reviewing! **


	12. Chapter 12

Ooh how I miss you

My symphony played the song that carried you out

Ooh how I miss you

And I, I miss you and I wish you'd stay

(Autumn Leaves by Ed Sheeran)

My absence from the night previous is noted. Macey questions me. I lie. Around, I say. I don't mention the fight between Zachary and I. Lies are essential, like living and breathing, second nature, not just to spies, but to everyone. Lies of omission, sparing the truth, changing the past, making life seem better, while reality is far worse. We lie to avoid reality, to avoid the facts of cold, uncaring life.

Walking to breakfast, I am ambushed by a mob of freshman boys, all looking for tips. Apparently, anyone who can beat the all might Zachary Goode is deserving of attention. As if. I've heard they like the Chameleon here at Blackthorn. Boy, are they in for a shock.

I ignore the young boys and slide into the dining hall, where they cannot see me in the crowd of Gallagher girls and Blackthorn boys.

I walk to my table, still aware, as a tap on my shoulder alerts me to Joe Solomon's presence.

I turn to see his face, unreadable. He beckons me away into an empty hallway . 'Cameron' he says. 'I'm your godfather.'

My world is spinning upside again and again. 'Process' my mind whispers feebly. My brain momentarily flicks off.

I nod quietly, afraid to speak, preferring to listen instead to the babble of chatter coming from the nearby dinning room.

'I've watched you' he claims. '2008 in Dubai, good work. Your father would be proud.'

My eyes widen involuntarily in surprise. The level or clearance require alone suggests... Well, he wasn't my father's friend for no good reason I decide. Not just anyone worthy of the honor.

'Cameron,' he says, 'I'm sorry'

Then he's gone.

I walk back, trying to remain steady like a sailor in a raging storm. The turmoil is winding my brain round and round, until it feels ready to break from the tension stored.

I gasp involuntarily, but cover it as a sneeze. _A good spy never reveals feelings._

I need to run, I need to leave, anything but sitting in a crowded room full of strangers. My friends stare. My eyes tell the story, and they understand and prepare for our escape. I love them more then ever in this instant. I feel a rush of affection for the girls sitting in front of me, the kind of love to die for, the kind of friendship that never ends.

But before we can run to the nearest secret passageway, Joe Solomon announces today's activities. Juniors: gun drill, Gallagher included.

I stand to leave, Macey, Bex, and Liz at my side.

We exit the hall with the smirking Blackthorn boy, all excited by the prospect of regaining their manliness. As if. More like the girls cementing their supremacy.

Ooh how I miss you

My symphony played the song that carried you out

Ooh how I miss you

And I, I miss you and I wish you'd stay

**I can't believe people have actually liked this story enough to give it almost 30 reviews. *fangirling inside***

**Thank you to the moon and back! **

**Day=Made**


	13. Chapter 13

Took off faster than a green light, go,

Hey, skip the conversation when you already know.

(Holy Ground by Taylor Swift)

10.67 miles later, the clearing approaches. Guns and cars line the dirt road.

'Ladies,' Joe says, 'today is what we call here at Blackthorn "challenge" day. Good luck'. He smirks, along with the other Blackthorn boys, all with crossed arms and triumphant expressions.

The battle is won, and we haven't even started. But it's not the boys who will be winning today. Gallagher girls can deal with a lot, but when someone questions our sisterhood, well, we take that very seriously around here. Just a little hint for some smirking Blackthorn boy. The lessons from P and E has apparently already been forgotten.

Each is given a gun, and a car. 'Shoot the targets and make it back to the start. All tricks are fair game. I'll be watching'

Mark. Get Set. GO.

Pedal floored, gun loaded, wheels spinning on the gravel. Speedometer flying, cars racing down the road. Window open, dust flying, Macey is next to me, grinning, Bex fires innocently at Grant's left tires.

Girls fight dirty.

Hugging corners, cutting paths, we race at top speed. Pedal to the floor, urging it forward, as if by the mere will power the race will be one. One by one, the boys drop behind. Bex laughs as she aims at a target, Macey screams as she makes a particularly tight turn. Liz's hands grip the steering wheel for dear life as she nearly flies through the window. I grin as the pure adrenaline rushes through my veins, spurring my on, on, on. Zach's car appears in my review mirror, struggling to catch us, his face is a mask of shock.

The finish line looms. I slow down, and Macey, Bex, Liz and I cross the line together. Hair sticking up, faces caked with dust, laughing we exit the cars, coming to an orderly line at Solomon's feet.

He doesn't look surprised when Zachary stomps over, clearly miffed by being beat by girls.

'I don't understand sir,' he complains. 'I've done this course thousands of times. How can they beat me?'

'After all', I mutter, 'we're only a couple of girls. Surely, a big boy like you would be able to destroy us, easily'. My friend's gasps seem to amuse Solomon as he sizes us up. I shocked even myself. What happened to staying undercover, under the radar? It just, well, slipped out. The Chameleon never makes mistakes. Every move is calculated, important.

Zach just glares, and the rest of the boys pull up, muttering about girls.

'Well, how did you do it then?' Zach asks angrily.

'Practice' I say. He has no idea just how true a statement that it.

_I remember well the first day my mother taught me to drive. My feet barely reached the pedals of the Porshe we had taken to an empty field. I was 8 years old at the time. _

'What would you know about racing cars?' they ask.

_ 'Press the pedal down, then move the wheel. You've got the instincts for this, kid. Just like your father', my mother says with a sad smile. _

Bex steps protectively in front of me.

_My hands grip the wheel, knuckles white. Slowly, the pedal inches down, down down. The car shoots forward, a silver, shiny racehorse. Off we go, over the dusty ground. _

Her stance is casual enough, but Bex makes her point clear: back off. If there's one thing these boy's do understand, its power plays.

_I stop the car, and look at my mother. There are tears in her eyes. 'Good job kid, good job.' That was the last time I ever spent time real time with my mother. After that, she started taking on more and more missions. _

Blackthorn boys back down under Bex's glare. They start the long jog up to the school.

'Thanks Bex', I say to her. She's given me more than protection from the boys, she's managed to save my cover. _Underestimation is a sure was for success. Or an operatives failure. _

Took off faster than a green light, go,

Hey, skip the conversation when you already know.

**Success! Published chapter. Now off to the homework I put off. How much homework do you guys have? A lot? **

**Review. **

**Yours Truly, Breann**


	14. Chapter 14

The playful conversation starts,

Counter all your quick remarks,

Like passing notes in secrecy.

(Enchanted by Taylor Swift)

We've returned to Blackthorn after our escapade in the woods.

Zach tracks me down during dinner. He glares in my direction.

Inwardly, I sigh. I try to ignore his presence.

'You,' he says roughly pointing at me.

Bex simply stares. Macey raises her eyebrows threateningly. I give them a look.

'How may I help you,' I say, ever so politely. Madame Dabney's buttons must be popping with pride.

The boy at least has the decency to look slightly abashed. I don't move, preferring simply to stay in my seat. Eventually, curiosity draws him nearer . _Curiosity didn't just kill the cat. It also killed the spy. _

'What's your real name,' he says. As if I am ever going to tell him.

'I've got lots,' I say and the game begins.

Questions, he has loads. Times, places, who, what, when's.

'Its classified' I say.

Angry words. Smooth smiles. I lie, while he scrambles for more information. We're dancing again, this time with words flying over our heads, snide comments, and the occasional twirl as I twist his own words against him.

Who, what, when, where, why. We live in a world of information.

Time, places, people, weapons, all these make up our history, the struggle between knowing and doing. Living and dying. _In a spy's life, knowing isn't just half the battle, it IS the battle. _

I tell him, 'Good luck finding out more.'

He storms off, cursing my name. I grin.

Macey rolls her eyes.

'Boys,' we all chorus.

Solomon shakes his head as he passes our table.

Zach sits down with his friends, while he stares at us, trying to puzzle together the information I've just given him.

I don't envy him the challenge. Figuring out the Chameleon. Something even I have not yet accomplished.

Dinner is over now.

We head to our rooms, far away from the prying eyes.

Bex plops onto her bed, Macey's façade drops, Liz heads over to her computer, and I loosen my hair and let it spill out from the confines of my braid. Our true selves, revealed.

Silence. Computer keys tapping, nail file shaping Macey's claws into perfect condition, and Bex's snores. Meanwhile, I stare, exhausted at the wall, spacing into a different dimension, all to myself. Chameleon's do get tired, after all. I'm just a simple human girl.

Macey clears her throat, her signal.

'Girls, I believe it's time for us to do some investigation of our own into this Mr. Goode. Let's start with the mission objectives.'

Leave it to Macey.

While Liz eagerly takes notes, I flop next to Bex on the bed, leaning my head against her shoulder. The brainstorming continues, a true brainhurricane. Macey whirls out suggestions faster than Tina Walters can spin a tale. Which, equates to very very fast.

They hypothesis are beginning to get out of hand.

'Maybe,' said Macey through a fit of giggles, ' he's secretly works for the United States Postal Service as a assassin/delivery boy, trying to track you down to deliver your shipment.'

Meanwhile, Bex intently stares at my face, studying my eyes like she's memorizing my features for the first time,

'I've got it!' Her thick British accent flies through the air. 'He's in love with Cam!'

Pen-drop silence.

Macey breaks out into a broad grin. 'Well done Bex, you were worth it. My first pupil, all grown up. I'd knew you'd understand!'

Macey and her theatrics.

Liz, on my right however, seems to analyze the possibilities.

'Oh no, not you too Lizzy!' I exclaim as she agrees with Bx's outrageous claims.

'Just you wait, Little Miss Cameron Morgan,' says Macey smugly, 'We'll get it out of him, then the rest is up to you.'

Friends. You've gotta love 'em.

I fall asleep, still chuckling at the stupidity of the suggestion. Zachary Goode love me? Never.

The playful conversation starts,

Counter all your quick remarks,

Like passing notes in secrecy.

**Thanks for reading! **

**Guess what lovelies? I made NJHS. Nothing big though. Sorry, I've got nothing else.**

**Thanks sooo much to all the reviews. Do you want to know how many? Well, I will enlighten you: 34 (at time of publication). That is atomic number for Selemium on the periodic table! Not that anyone would want to know that. I'm in AP chem: it sucks. Note: AVOID AT ALL COSTS. **

**Besides the fact that there are 34 reviews, the number 44 is for Ruthenium... Just saying ;)**

With Much Love and Without further ado...

Breann


	15. New Chapter 15!

**ZACH's POV:**

And they scream

'The worst things in life come free to us'

And we are all under the upperhand

(A Team by Ed Sheeran)

Later at night, I see her. She wanders the halls aimlessly. I wonder why. Doesn't she have something better to do?

Apparently not.

Hidden in the shadow, she doesn't see me, too busy dodging camera's to pay attention to me, hidden in the corridor.

The girl climbed into a secret passageway. Damn she was good, I'd been living here for years and I had only found one. Yet, within a day she manages to find more passageways then I had ever seen.

Suddenly, the desire to know more about this mysterious girl flares in my chest. As the passage door closes, I follow behind, intending to corner her.

I wait for a few minutes, hoping to catch her off guard.

I open the door, springing into attack position.

She's crying.

Quiet sobs that pierce my heart. My cold, impenetrable heart, surrounded by scars. She's broken in. I feel a stirring of compassion for her. I try to ignore the sensation. I'm an assassin for goodness sakes. We have no feelings. Supposedly.

'Oh' she says as she looks up. At the sight of my face, she looks surprised, but resigned. There's no hiding from your memories.

I sit down next to her, and she flinches. I feel my hopes sink.

I suppose I deserve that.

Her eyes still haunt me. Red from tears, still wet and fresh from the latest cry, and full of pain. Eyes that have stared back at me in the mirror countless times.

We are similar she and I.

Yet, so different, worlds apart as we sit together in a passageway.

It's silent, tears and water plink onto the floor.

Silence can be the soul's best healer, and the minds greatest regret.

I open my mouth, heart full, mind empty.

In the end, I simply whisper

'The worst things in life come free to us'

She smiles weakly.

'What's the matter?'

At my probing questions, she instantly bristles. Training kicks in and she hides her weakness.

'Why should I trust you?' Her voice is bitter, full of past betrayals.

I stand up, crouching in the tiny tunnel. 'I'll show you'.

She takes my hand. I feel her small, cold hands in mine, and feel renewed confidence in my plan. If it would just show her. But how can you paint a picture of your trust?

Exiting, she recoils slightly at the cool air and stone floors. She nearly floats, so tiny, so delicate.

I lead her out of the school into the dark night skies.

The barbed wire fence stands out, painfully obvious in the light of the moon. The pale light illuminates a well worn pathway, beaten away by the countless feet marching, some never to return.

I lead her down to the subs. The tunnels so well hidden only a few of the students have ever discovered them.

She never falters. We stop on the outside of the entrance. The door remains unlocked at all times. Their so cocky, the Circle. They believe no one else could find this place. Even if they considered the possibility, they would have laughed at the mass havoc it's discovery would have created.

I swing open the vault door and lead her inside. She takes in every detail. Cold, stone walls. Florescent light, flickering on the ceiling.

We emerge into the main room.

The effects of my decision may haunt me forever as I step through the door.

Stacks of guns and ammo litter the floor. Filing cabinets shoved against the corner. "Torture chamber off the your left", I say to myself, imagining the tour I could give her.

Her face gives away no emotion. I hope she knows the risk I've just taken.

'So this is how they do it.' Her words surprise me.

'What?' I say, confused.

'The Circle.' she says, as if it was obvious.

'How...' I can't seem to comprehend her words. Here I was, trying to surprise and shock her, while she seems to know just as much, or more than me.

I sigh inwardly. What did I expect?

She looks at me, a small smile on her lips. 'You wanted to surprise me, didn't you?'

Was I really so obvious?

'The Circle likes to play games. Don't get caught Zach.' She says.

'But how?'

'I have my ways. You're not the only one who's been caught by the Circle, Zachary. I've seen your scars.'

Oh right, that night boxing.

'I am surprised however,' she continues, 'that you were brave enough to show me here. Thank you Zachary.'

'Call me Zach' I say, still in shock.

'Cammie.'

I look at her confused.

'My name.'

Then, she turns and leaves. I follow her, still shaking my head.

And they scream

'The worst things in life come free to us'

And we are all under the upperhand

**I decided to re-write my old chapter 15. This one is way better than the last one. (I wrote it late at night, give me some slack). Anyways, hope you like it. Wanna read more? Review and give me songs or lyrics you think would be cool to use. Or ideas/things you want in the story.**

**Love, ME**


	16. Chapter 16

**And we are back to Cammie's POV.**

**PS if you haven't read the new chapter 15 I put up, then you should because you will need it for the newt chapters. **

You just need to remember...

I will love you 'til the end of time

"Blue Jeans" by Lana Del Rey

PREVIOUSLY ON UNDONE **A/N: I've always want to say that like how they do on TV shows. Continue.**

_I am surprised however,' she continues, 'that you were brave enough to show me here. Thank you Zachary.'_

_'Call me Zach' I say, still in shock._

_'Cammie.'_

_I look at her confused._

_'My name.'_

_Then, she turns and leaves. I follow her, still shaking my head._

I step out of the door. Why did I tell him my name?

I start up the long passageway, eyes facing the bright sunlight pouring through the opening. What will happen now?

I run the last few steps out to freedom. How can I face this feeling?

I leave the tunnel behind, and with it, my thoughts of Zach.

Slowly, I begin to creep cautiously back to dorm. Bare feet, barely making a sound.

Tick, tock, tick, tock. I stiffen as I hear the sound of a clock ticking nearby. The sound is unnatural, piercing the silence of the night. Something is wrong. I feel it, deep down, my instincts insisting to my mind of nearby danger. I slow my pace, not wanting to be caught off guard.

'Cameron'

His voice is smooth, deep, melodic in the empty stillness. He emerges from the nearest classroom. The clock ticking inside reminds my of my life, ticking slowly away.

'We need to talk'

I enter the class room silently. He pearches himself on the teacher's desk, one leg up, hands resting on kneecaps. I sit crossleged on one of the desks at the front. I begin my meditative yoga, simply appearing disinterested. Breathe in and out. Inside, my heart is racing.

In.

'You have a lot to answer for Joe,' I say.

Out.

'I know." he simply says

In.

'Where were you all those years? Where were you when she needed you?' I will not cry, I will not cry. I will not betray my emotions.

Out.

'A spy's life is never easy Cameron. I got busy. You know as well as I, your mother, she wouldn't have it any other way...' his voice trails off.

In.

'You could have tried.' I say. My voice is calm, steely. I will not raise my voice, I will not raise my voice. I will not give anyone the satisfaction.

Out.

Silence.

'I was wrong. It's my fault, it's all my fault.' Tears drip off Joe Soleman's nose. The man I'd looked up to, before I even knew he was my godfather. The man whose stories were told lovingly around the dinner table by my father. The man who sat before me was crying. CIA legacy, tough assassin, top spy for the world. Tears were tracing his checks.

In.

My thoughts dissolved as I ran to hug his shoulders. 'Joey,' I used my father's old nickname for him, 'Joey, stop it. No one blames you for anything.'

Out.

Inside, I'm screaming with questions.

In.

He straightens up, and wipes his eyes, though tears still threaten to fall.

Out.

'Cammie,' he says, 'I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being there fore you. I'm sorry for the times you cried yourself to sleep every night..'

How did he know?

In.

'I'm sorry,' he continues, 'for not calling. For not writing. For observing from the sidlines as my best friend's child learned how to kill a man at the age of 6. I'm sorry for watching you turn from a loving child into a hardened teen. I'm sorry, Matthew.'

He stares into my eye. I know he's not just talking to me now. His words a meant for my father, dead, buried, alone in the cold ground.

Out.

'I know I could have done it,' he says to me, 'raised you I mean. Matthew always said that if... when...', his voice broke.

In.

Joe regains composure. 'When he died, I knew I should have told you. I knew that's what he wanted. But I couldn't do it. I couldn't face your eyes every day, reminding me of him. I don't know how Rachel did it for so long. You look so much like your father Cammie. Every time I see you, I see Matthew.'

Out.

'I'd tell myself that you were better off without me. I'd justify that you would't miss what you never had. The truth was Cam, I was scared. Scared of facing a world I knew I could have changed. Scared that if you'd ever found out, you'd hate me. And now you know.'

In.

'I made him go on that last mission. I was the one who denied the Director's call. Denied the change to save my best friend, my brother's life. I could have been the one to take his bullet. I had nothing while he had everything. He had you.'

Out.

I'm crying now, the second time of the night. All the memories, Joe's voice paints the times spent holding his hand, practicing brush passes, eating ice cream in the tiny cafe that was our favorite spot.

I picture Joe's face now, imposed on the memories. It's Joe holding my hand, ordering me an ice cream sundae. Then my father's back, laughing as he pulled me in our little red wagon.

In.

'You should have been there, but you weren't, Joe.'

Out.

'I know,' he hangs his head in shame.

In.

'He'd understand,' I look up at the ceiling, letting the moonlight from the window shine on my face. 'He'd know you were trying. The best is all you can do Joe. I don't blame you, and neither does he. So let's start again.'

Out.

He looks at me, like a man who's just been handed a life preserver in a stormy sea. 'Could we?' his voice is merely a whisper. 'Would you let me be your substitute father? Would you let me be there for you? Would you mind me being there, in his spot?' In his voice is a note of hope, like a ray of sunshine.

In.

'Yes', I reply, just as soft. 'I'd like that, Dad.'

Out.

Flashing forward. I'm married now, Joe's walking me down the isle. I've got kid, their running towards him, shouting "Grandpa!". He's watching me drive off to a mission, and there's worry in his eyes. I'm there when his casket is lowered to the ground. He's there in my heart the whole time.

He's not my father, but he will do.

You just need to remember...

I will love you 'til the end of time

**Oh this chapter... Did it kill you as much as it killed me? Haha life is cruel. **

**Who liked it? Raise your hand, raise it high!**

**Oh I can't see it.**

**In the meantime, reviewing is basically the same thing as raising your hand.**

**So do it. **

**Love! **


	17. Chapter 17

**Oh. My. Gosh. **

**I. Just. Got. Up. To. 54. Reviews. (fangirling) I'm guessing you guys liked the last chapter**

**I was at school thinking "oh I might get up to like 45 reviews today, Hope people liked it." But once again, Gallagher Girls go above and beyond. Sighs dramatically. **

**I would like to thank every single person who reviewed my story. I'm sorry chapter 15 was kinda cheesy, really I am, but I have no idea how to write a love story without being cheesy. I don't want to be a shallow author. So therefore tell me what to do so you won't have to gag when you read my story!**

**For those who gave me suggestions for lyrics, thanks! I really like your ideas and I promise to incorporate when possible! **

**Also... When the writing is in Cammie's POV, the language is more advanced, because Cam is very smart and thinks about things in a different light then others. That's the function of the whole "weirdo- poetic- non teenager-what the heck-" writing style. FYI, not that it makes any difference. **

**Previously On Undone...**

_He looks at me, like a man who's just been handed a life-preserver in a stormy sea. 'Could we?' his voice is merely a whisper. 'Would you let me be your substitute father? Would you let me be there for you? Would you mind me being there, in his spot?' In his voice is a note of hope, like a ray of sunshine._

_'Yes', I reply, just as soft. 'I'd like that, Dad.'_

_He's not my father, but he will do._

I need you, I don't need you  
I need you, I don't need you  
And all of that jiving around

**"Chelsea Hotel No. 2"**  
(originally by Leonard Cohen)

I finally make it to my bed.

I'm so busy, so wrapped in my own world, my mind won't take a rest.

My words to Joe still haunt me. Would my father really not mind? Would replacement really be the highest form of betrayal? My mind argues back and forth the whole night.

_He was his best friend._

_ He's the only father you'll ever really have._

_He's my Godfather! _

_ He's your REAL father_

_I want him to be my dad._

_ But are you willing to give him up for a substitute?_

_I need him._

_ But is it for the best?_

_The best? The best for who?_

_For you. _

The arguments tossed and turned around in my head, over and over. Like a teetering pile, tipping in one side, then the other, destined to fall, yet unwilling to commit.

_I need a father. _

Some people need air, some people need food. Yet, I need love and consistency.

Some people die of dehydration. Some people die of AIDS. Yet spies are killed by connection.

Was I willing to throw it all away, throw caution to the wind, take a step into the unknown? Was I willing to sacrifice my certain future for the present and a hazy outline of times to come? Was it worth it, to sacrifice for the individual at the cost of the many?

_A spy is always selfish._

Is love selfish? Love prompted Romeo and Juliet to break tradition, and their families and caused the death of a dear friend.

Is love unselfish? Love caused the their ultimate sacrifice.

Could a person be selfish and unselfish at the same time? Could I want something I never was destined to have?

I stay up until the morning sun peaks through the windows, and Macey's alarm rings it's familar call.

The girls are up, bustling around, getting ready for school. The bags under my eyes do not go unnoticed.

On the way to breakfast, I inform them of the night's events. I need at least someone to trust, even when I can't trust myself.

My feet are slow, my eyes are heavy, my mind is processing at half its normal rate. But I still notice a dark shadow, tall, well-muscled and smirking slinking up to me as I sit, picking at my food.

Zach, the person I need most NOT to see right not.

Bex, on the other hand, is delighted that such an opportunity has fallen right into her lap. Time to test her theory, I suppose. Scooting me closer to Zach, she begins a conversation, trying to involve Zach as much as possible.

She sure knows how to lay it on thick.

By the time breakfast has concluded and the day's activities announced, Zach's face is cracking from the width of his smirk.

I'm simply too tired to care.

Thinking really takes it out of a girl. The crying from the night before most likely had nothing to do with it. Or so I tell myself.

'Bex, I swear, if you have any respect left for me, please do not talk to Zachary Goode at the moment. I simply cannot deal with him right now.' I tell her in a low voice as Zach trots off to Grant, his face openly mocking me with his smile.

'Fine Cam, but I'm serious on this one. The boy likes you, but it's up to you what you want to do with it. Think of all the possibilities.' she replies.

Sighing, I trudge towards first period. Can't a girl ever get away with a little weakness without the enemies ever swooping in for the kill?

I haven't seen Joe today, but he appears in our Cove-Ops class to announce:

'Hello Ladies. As you may or may not know, my name is Joseph Solemon and I have worked for Blackthorn for more years then I care to enumerate. In light of present circumstances,' his eyes flicked to me 'I have decided an a change in occupation.'

The Gallagher girls stare politely, questioning the relevance of this interruption. But I know what it's about.

'Haven't I made myself clear? I'm teaching at Gallagher Academy for Exceptional Young Women the following semester. Good luck. You will need it.'

Macey, Bex and Liz all turn and stare.

I simply beam.

Joe's coming home.

I need you, I don't need you  
I need you, I don't need you  
And all of that jiving around


	18. Chapter 18

**excerpt From Cammie Morgan's Blackthorn Cove-Ops Report **

The days here at Blackthorn have fallen into a routine. Endless routine, full of boring classes, gaping boys, and flirting girls.

I order my girls not to participate. (Well it wasn't exactly ordering, though Macey may have taken it that way.)

Classes were incredibly, impossibly, mind-numbingly easy. The girls and I had spent our summers advancing through material typically taken by top level operatives. But I wanted to be prepared for anything. Who knows? Maybe, if I would have just studied a little harder, I could have saved someone's life, or prevented compromise on a mission. Whatever the case, a little studying never went amiss. According to Liz and I, at least.

The boys. Oh those Blackthorn boys. You'd think they'd never seen a girl before. Though I know for a fact at smuggled magazines here are more expensive then drugs. The illicit business ventures here are made 1000 times harder when your teachers are spies too. But none the less, the appeal of gaping like a fish never seems to wear off on some boys. You'd think they'd want to catch flies.

Gallagher Girls have shamelessly lead them on. I have no comment for such behavior.

This marks the 6th week of our exchange. We should be heading home soon. No word from the bosses.

Something here is going very wrong.

**Cammie's POV**

I finished my daily Covert Operations Report for the day, though the exercise has lost all value since our last weeks at Blackthorn.

Joe looks pensive when I talk to him every night.

Zach stares at me in the hallway. We're on friendlier terms, ever since that night in the caves. I've lightened up around him, though I never reveal too much, directly at least. Our friendship, if you can even call it that, is still considered a secret to the general public.

I sat up from my position lying on the bed when Bex enters our room.

'Cam,' she says, 'what do you do when you like someone?'

Dear god what is she talking about.

'Um..' I say, for the first time at a loss for words. 'I don't know, hack into their records, search their trash, and follow them to every meeting or something? I don't know, ask Macey.'

She just nods and flops onto the bed. The springs creak as she shifts her weight.

'Want to talk about it?' I ask, secretly hoping, that actually she didn't.

'Naw...' she says, relieving me about a discussion of feelings and mushy girl emotions I've never understood.

Silence, pure blissful silence.

It last for 65.9 seconds before Bex sits up eagerly.

'I know Cam!' she says, 'Let's go down to the gym. I overheard a freshmen talking about it. Apparently there's some competition between the boys. Happens every year. It's a tradition. We should go watch you know. Size up the competition, if you don't want'

'Bex,' I cut her off, 'next time just tell me you want to go watch Grant fight. It's cool with me.'

She blushes. Bex. Baxter. Blushes. God, what is wrong this this school and those damn boys?

'Thanks' and she rushes off to change, slamming me in the head with a tank top and shorts to wear.

We walk down to the gym, Bex fighting to control the swing in her step as we cross the grass to the imposing warehouse where the Blackthorn boys practiced fighting.

Before we even reach the door, I hear voices chanting, smell the sweat and blood and feel the tension packing each boys body as they stand, packed together around the center of the room. In the middle, a blue mat houses two bloody, sweaty boys, fighting with kicks and punches, ducking, rolling around in a sea of limbs.

Looks like fun.

I slip inside, while Bex eases up to the center stage, enjoying the limelight. When she wants, Bex is like a panther. But, like every other girl, she lives on the attention the Blackthorn boys feed her. _Some spies are strong in the open, and some spies find strength in the darkness._

Joe's grinning at me from the other side of the room.

I smile back and slide between the packed boys to his side.

I doubt any of them even noticed motion near them.

Joe's outfitted in standard workout attire at Blackthorn; navy blue and yellow Nike shirt with standard shorts under. Only a cover- _real spies must be able to fight in whatever their wearing._ I groaned inwardly as I remembered a time in Singapore where Macey and I had to defend ourselves wearing full ball gowns.

Joe stands there awkwardly, not knowing exactly what to say. Though I can't entirely blame him. He's simple an older version of the Blackthorn boys, I realize. And that include being socially awkward I supposed.

We're still watching the fight, when a boy calls out, "Teacher Challenge". The crowd of Blackthorn boys roars like a lion, chanting Joe's name as they pull him to the front.

I slip into the shadow as he moves up to the mat, but stay close enough to keep an eye on his progress. Now, I'm alone.

Of course, he slides up to me. Of all people. I notice his steps are lighter then normal, as if he's trying to catch up. "Good luck" I think to myself.

He's shirtless.

Not, obviously, that it made any difference to me. I shove away any girl thoughts at the sight of him. Not that I'd ever had any thoughts about his physical appearance.

Most of the boys here had forgone a shirt, forgetting (or intentionally), the girls roaming around their school. All showcasing varying levels of buff muscles. The Blackthorn Program trains for strength, not for grace. A tactic which I was more than happy to exploit on any boy foolish enough to stare too long.

Hiding is so much harder when people think you're pretty. Everyone, it seems, finds ideals of perfect, culmination into the epitome of society's current obsession. This decade, skinny, long, blonde hair, not too tall, not too short, athletic, and perfect. Why do people worship the perfection they themselves can never have? Why leave the fantasies of perfection from a few onto the greater whole of people? Why not let people find their own beauty? Now, beauty is written out, defined, set apart in a convention of the elite.

I'm an ideal of beauty. I've never wanted it. I shun it, but I can't hide from the outside, nor from the in. I'm cornered.

Zach's closing in. He's taller than me, much taller. He tower imposingly over my small form. In this instance, I wish the roles were reversed, and I was the tall one, head visible above the crowd.

'Hey Cammie'

Then the crowd's attention shifts, towards Zach. He's called up to the stage.

My momentary obliqueness is gone. Now I edge slowly to the shadows, hoping to avoid attention.

Bex is at the microphone. 'I'd like Cameron to come up here right. Now.'

Zach smirks at me with a mischievous look in his eyes. He pulls my hand, out into the open. Like a helpless deer in the middle of an African savannah.

I've been seen, I've been exploited. They know my name.

_In a spies business, names are power._

I'm in the middle of the mat now, Bex and Macey at my side. We face off with Zach and two other boys, all grinning.

A whistle blows somewhere.

Kick. 'Bex, why the hell did you do this to me?' I whisper quietly into her ear as we flipped off each others backs to attack Grant's shoulders.

Punch. 'Oh Cam's its no biggie.' she giggles with glee.

Have I taught her nothing.

Duck. 'We'll do this later.'

I need to get out of the bright spotlight, quickly.

Punch. Punch. Punch. Zach was unlucky enough to come into rage of my fists. Eye black, wind gone, nose broken.

Moving on. Bex and I take the giant burly steroid, Grant is his name. Bex, if you get out of this alive, I think, you two would be good for each other. Too late, I kick him in the gut, hard, practicing my flips off his back into the next boys face, who had come around to help his mates.

Already, we'd knocked 2 boys from the game and the 3rd is no match for 3 highly trained Gallagher Girls. (Particularly when one of them is an extremely angry Chameleon).

The noise of the crowd had quieted soon after we had taken down Zach. If the eyes weren't staring before, taking down the most formidible Blackthorn boy, while wearing a tank-top- which had ridden up considerably and using moves even certain gymnists could not complete. Joe is looking around rather offended, though no one else knows of our relationship. Already assuming his protective duties.

Curse Bex.

The silence was what made me hear them. Above Blackthorn came the sound of muffled copter wings. In the crowded gym of moments before, such a sound would have gone unnoticed, even by me, until perhaps it was too late.

But the unexpected silence made it clear; an attack was coming.

Who would need to use the cover of game day, to fly in a helicopter? Obviously, someone with inside knowledge.

But why?

My eyes meet Joe's across the packed space.

Panic flares in his steely gaze.

I drop to the ground just as the roof hammers with the metallic sound of heavy foot falls.

**I can feel your little hearts pounding with suspense... Mwahahaha.**

**I'm so sorry I was mean.**

**Why don't you tell me how mean I am in a review. I really want to get 69 plus reviews. (hehe)**

**Thanks for reading. Post longer chapter on Friday, because I have track tomorrow, and NJHS elections, and Piano, and Teaching Piano Lessons... and at least 3 hours of Homework. All in one day. Plus church class in the morning. Fun.**

**BTW's the beauty rant above was off topic, just felt like it.**

**Review, and thanks for reviewing, I love all of you to ****death. :) **


	19. Chapter 19

When my mind wonders and memories fade, fade

Telling me I'll never win as I'm betting

My last coins on the game, the game

So close that door, and I'll seal the floors

And they'll die away

Like a building I will fall to the ground

Then what am I with only foundations?

Skeletons By Nina Nesbitt

_The silence was what made me hear them. Above Blackthorn came the sound of muffled copter wings. In the crowded gym of moments before, such a sound would have gone unnoticed, even by me, until perhaps it was too late._

_But the unexpected silence made it clear; an attack was coming._

_Who would need to use the cover of game day, to fly in a helicopter? Obviously, someone with inside knowledge._

_But why?_

_My eyes meet Joe's across the packed space._

_Panic flares in his steely gaze._

_I drop to the ground just as the roof hammers with the metallic sound of heavy foot falls._

By now, the Blackthorn boys had realized something was wrong. Despite their deficiencies, they hadn't spent all of their loves training for nothing. Mostly.

From my crouch on the ground, I could see organized chaos overtaking the gym. Bex was ducking down like me, while Macey had scampered out to find the exit. I crawled past a Blackthorn boy preparing his gun, while another was scoping out defensive positions on the side lines, confused about the best course of action. I could see their questioning eyes, wondering if this was simple a test. This was no drill.

I clambered closer to Joe, who was making his way towards me through the crowd of Blackthorn boys.

Think Cammie, Think!

'Their coming for me.' The words are little more than a broken breath as it escapes my lips.

Joe's by my side. He's dragging me across the room. My mind is numb.

Ice slices my skin, horror clots my veins. Somehow, someone, some place. They've found me.

Urgency fuels my steps now. I barely notice Joe's crushing grip, Zach's buzzing presence. Their worried looks, as though I can't care for myself. I can't find the will to care.

I am a number, a mission, an easily replaceable object. I was young then, foolish, filled with notions about the world.

We exit the gym, and Joe pulls me towards the trees. Zach follows. Joe yells at Zach, 'Keep her safe.'

He turns and sprints back off to the school.

Do I really mean so little to them? Does my training, my reputation, my legacy mean so little? How could a boy I could take down in seconds protect me from the such forces which had the capability of taking down the Chameleon?

indignance fills my mind, dropping me down to reality, the hard, cold, facts of the situation.

I yank my arm from Zach's grasp, and race back to the gym before he can stop me. I can only hope I'm faster then he is. His legs are longer.

Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot. Zach begins the chase, struggling to catch up.

'Gallagher girl' he says, voice quiet, 'if you're going to run, at least let me come.'

I look back, surprised by his sincerity, judging his face.

His eyes are tight, his forehead pinched, his lips are 2 pieces of frustration forged together. I step backward and 10,000 tiny particles shatter behind me as the roof crashes down upon the nearby gym.

I'm numb again. Powerless all over again. Melting from within, life seeping out of my limbs.

Bex, Macey, Joe. All in the collapsing prison of a building. My worst fears are confirmed, nightmares replayed in slow motion as I turn and see the hole drop to the center of the gym.

Instinct takes over, years of refining skills, leading down to the moment of truth, the true test of skills. I can't think, I can't breathe, I can't live without action.

I move.

I run faster than a flowing river, pushing, pushing, pushing my limits. Jumping the boundaries of physical limitations.

Right foot, left, right foot, left, right foot, left.

I creep into the open doorway, full of clueless students, unsure, confused. The hole in the roof has allowed 5 agents access into the center of the room. Bex, never one to back down, Macey, loyal to her friends and Joe, my only family left, center of the chaos, fending off the attackers.

Fending off my nightmares.

I've spent my years running away, I've spent all my time flying away, too scared to leave my prints.

Its useless.

I plunge into the crowd of students, coming to their senses.

'Wait,' he's grabbing my arm, panting, 'stay, Joe would want you to.'

You can't run forever, I've learned. So I disappear into the center of the room.

They outnumber my three lifelines. Fighting 5 formidable, overpowering shadows.

I enter from behind, and engage the largest of the 5.

Joe's eyes widen in fear. 'No' he whispers, and sustains a blow to the jaw. His opponent exploits his disadvantage, advancing on Joe with malicious violence. Joe kicks, but not before his opponent lands a blow to his stomach.

Anger fuels my arms. I hit, punch, twist, pummel. He crumples at the hit to his temple, and I quickly dispatch him with a blow to the external carotid artery. Bex is backing nearer to the wall, Macey's losing endurance fast, while Joe's lapse has secured him 3 more blows. I lock eyes with Bex for a moment and we come to a silent understanding.

Zach's joined the fray, fending off the unattended attacker. He yells unintelligible to the other Blackthorn and congregate to Macey and Bex's aid.

I sneak behind Joe's attacker and together, we fight.

He falls to the ground, and the rest of the enemy agents have been dispatched.

All 5 have fallen, unconscious, at our feet. I hear the sounds of the roster growing farther and father away.

I turn to Joe, 'What'

He takes my hand. 'We're leaving'

His eyes, leaving no room for question. 'Bex, Macey, and Liz? Their coming, their my team.'

He nods. 'Zach, get Elizabeth Sutton and bring her immediately to the place we discussed. You know the way. Hurry.' And he rushes off.

Joe turns to Bex and Macey. 'We're leaving'

'No question.'

'What about the other Blackthorn boys?' Bex can resist asking one last question.

Joe looks grimly around as we exit the gym. 'The Circle won't harm the boys. It's Cameron their after.'

Bex and Macey look at me, hoping for some reassurance that it was a mistake, that it would all be alright.

'It's true'.

We run.

When my mind wonders and memories fade, fade

Telling me I'll never win as I'm betting

My last coins on the game, the game

So close that door, and I'll seal the floors

And they'll die away

Like a building I will fall to the ground

Then what am I with only foundations?

**Technically, I wrote/published this on Friday, so I didn't break my promise. It just happened later than I wanted it to.**

**Has anyone read Shatter Me? MY GOSH IF YOU HAVEN'T READ IT GO NOW! Just read it. Oh MY Gosh. So amazingly written and creative. Please? I need a fangirling buddy in this one!**

**Review please! PS got 69 reviews! thanks That's an amazing number!**

**Love you all!**


	20. Chapter 20

It's alright, just wait and see

Your string of lights is still bright to me

Oh, who you are is not where you've been.

You're still an innocent,

Innocent by Taylor Swift

What's the point of trying to fight when you just keep losing the battle?

Joe leads us down a path into the woods.

Why am I always the cause of trouble?

We're running now, down, down, down, straight to the heart of the cold forest. I don't know where we're going. I don't know how to get there. I don't know what's happening. I just don't know.

It's like a piece of me is missing, torn from me. My integral classification as one who knows. _A spy always knows_

Is this what trust feels like? Like running through the woods, only knowing that you have no control? I've never been one to trust. My friends, I trust them, but I've never been so powerless. I've always been on the top, supervising. The roles are reversed now. I'm stumbling blindly forward into a future where I cannot see the outcomes.

We run. And run. And run.

I stop thinking for a moment. Not knowing, not thinking. I'm seeing. It's a new experience for me. I see the birds in the trees without calculating their velocity. I see the flowers near the path and enjoy their beauty instead of classifying their edible stems. I see Bex ahead of me and notice how her hair flows, instead of creating new training schemes. My eyes have been replaced from their hard, ocean-like blue to a dazzling gem of sapphire.

I should be worrying right now, I should be analyzing, I should be calculating. I should be doing my part.

But I just run, and let the nature around me swallow me into a comfortable rhythm of birds, animals and the racing pulse of my heart.

Joe slows down and creeps quietly ahead, while Macey and Bex file behind me. Joe holds out his hand. 'I'll run a perimeter check' and then he's off into a clearing.

The center of the green stage, surrounded by nature's props is a cabin, serene and peaceful. The porch is facing us, and I see how it runs along the entire front of the house. I notice a solitary rocking chair, painted white, creaking slowly with the slight breeze that rushes through the meadow. The house is made of flat, wooden boards, left in their rustic condition with a little red door and windows with real shutters. The plants, I notice, are well cared for, dotting the yard of green grass and cultivated wild flowers.

Joe walks across the field quickly, and approaches the door. From our position on the edge of the clearing nearly 100 feet away, I can manage to see the small key he takes out of his pocket. It flasher gold for a moment, then the door's open, and Joe enters the house.

We stand, listening to the quiet sounds of the forest behind us.

Joe's head re-appears and he beckons us towards him with a smile. Across the yard, on the porch. I enter.

To my left it a brilliant grand piano, shiny and black, polished well. Down the hall, turning right, I see the kitchen, filled with stainless- steel and polished pans. Bedroom doors branch to the sides, and in the center is a living room full blankets and couches.

It's perfection.

'Joe,' I say, 'what is this place?'

He grins, 'Welcome home Cam's.'

I stare at him. 'This is your home? But its so perfect!'

He bursts out laughing.

We're sitting around the kitchen table now, when there's a knock on the door and a familiar 'Oppsie Daisy' as Liz trips over the doorframe.

'Lizzy!' and then we're up and hugging her, squeezing the worry right out of all of us. Zach stands uncomfortable in the shadows.

'Are you ok? What happened? Was there an attacker? Who was it? Did you get hurt? How many were there? How did they find you? What are we going to do now? What about the rest of the girls? What's happening?' Liz questions us rapidly.

Before I can even begin to answer, Macey turns to Joe with a familiar gleam in her eye.

'Precisely,' she says, 'What is happening and why have you guys not told us anything!' she's glaring at Joe and Zach, who look guiltily away.

'It's a long story.'

I'm curled on the couch next to Bex as Joe weaves the tale of the Circle of Cavan. I already know these details, but his melodic voice is soothing, so I let him talk.

'Their looking for something' Joe concludes.

I roll my eyes. 'Yes Joey dear. There's no need to refrain in present company. I know their looking for me, and I know that his,' I point to Zach, 'mother is spearheading the effort to place agents around and near Gallagher. I know Blackthorn is heavily influenced by the Circle, yet only indirectly, and I know they killed my father and possibly lead to my mother's disappearance. I know they were looking for me today, and I know they'll stop at nothing to get me. So thank you for trusting me as much as I trust you.' I say.

Their faces of shock show me I've hit a nerve.

Quietly, I slip from the room. My friends will fill me in on the rest of the briefing later.

I run to the piano room, and close the sound proof door. I don't care anymore who hears me, I just care for solitude. My fingers fly in a familiar melody, racing each other up and down the keys. Over and over, the same sequence repeated, over and over, transformed each time into a new form of beauty.

'You're wrong, you know.' He says as he slides down next to me on the bench. I stop playing immediately. 'She's not my mother. Sure, she might have given birth to me, but we're not the same.'

'I know.' I say. I know about wanting to run from who you are. People looking at you because your parents were famous. Their looks of pity, and sometimes hatred.

I notice how he looks at me then, in surprise, and shock. Something about his eyes makes me open my mouth. The words spill out like a cold waterfall.

'My parents were the greatest CIA agents in history. Everyone looked to me like I was so lucky. So lucky for what? Lucky that my parents were gone? Lucky that I had to live with the fear of them never coming back? I knew they loved me, but that doesn't change it. Then after my father died. The looks of pity, the false condolences. "It's ok Cammie" they'd say. But nothing was OK. I know why my mom never cam back after that. There wasn't much to come back for. But she at least could have taken me with her.' I sigh. I hadn't meant to tell him anything, that was never the plan. I rather shocked by my words.

'My mother never wanted to have a kid.' He says, voice full of pain,' I was only there to "slow her down" she said. She left me alone once I could feed myself. She'd come back and say how much she missed me, but then she'd just leave again. When I turned 12 she shipped me Blackthorn, where the Circle holds its primary recruiting grounds. I think she expected me to grow up and turn out to be just like her. But I'll just keep fighting it, as long as I live.'

Our eyes lock. We were similar, him and I. Yet so completely different. My parents always loved me but had to, his had never cared then left him. But the outcome was the same-heartbreak ad a crippled trust muscle.

I know his pain. I've woken up every morning to carry the same burden, the same guilt around with me each day. I can see the toll his mother has taken on him.

I reach out and take his hand, I squeeze it once, gently.

He pulls me into a bear hug, picking my feet off the ground. He sets me down and beams at me gratefully.

'Thanks for understanding. You're the first one to look at me like I'm a normal kid. Those boys at Blackthorn, they look up to me. They see being Catherine's son to be a privilege. They expect me to be as ruthless as her.'

I nod. I've never talked to anyone before about my past. My friends know, I tell them everything, but I keep to myself mostly.

Something stirs in my stomach. Butterflies? Am I nervous about talking to him?

I don't know, but I slip out of the door before any more strange things can happen to me.

It's alright, just wait and see

Your string of lights is still bright to me

Oh, who you are is not where you've been.

You're still an innocent,

Hey! Hope you likeeeee ittt. I suck at writing Zammie chapters. Ideas? PLEASE!

Review!


	21. Chapter 21

Pain is only relevant if it still hurts,  
I forget like an elephant, or we can use a sedative and go back to the day we fell in love just on our first kiss

UNI by Ed Sheeran

I woke up at 5 am sharp the next morning. The sun was still hiding beneath the trees, and Joe's house was quiet. The girls and I were sleeping in one of the spare bedrooms, and Zach had claimed a room for himself next door. Bex still snored on beside me, Macey's face looked peaceful and calm, while Liz was curled into a ball, dreaming, possibly of computers. I was alone.

I found my way to the bathroom and looked into the mirror. Physical appearances had never mattered to me before, unless it was to change mine. I looked different in the artificial light, my reflection staring back at me, a challenge.

I looked weak. I _felt_ weak.

Without thinking, I grabbed my knee length spandex running pants, and my running jacket, then headed outside to lace up my running shoes.

The morning was cool and moist, the dew was rising off the ground and still clinging to every particle of grass. The stillness was peaceful, undisturbed by human influence. The forest smelled of cedar and pine, and the needles crunched under my feet as I headed off at a jog.

Running, running away. Running to nowhere, running to everywhere.

The music in my ears pounded along with the rhythm of my feet. Kenny Loggins Footloose.

_I've got this feeling/That times are holding me down/I'll hit the ceiling/Or else I'll tear up this town._

I left the forest behind, coming to a gravel road. The crunch of gravel grew louder and louder, faster and faster as I increased me speed. Soon, I was sprinting, full speed, imagining my nightmares chasing my tail. I kept going, feeling the pain, willing my brain to stop feeling and start _living_. The pain was gone now, replaced by power. Down the road, flying feet and flying rocks, until I reached the end. _Pain is 100 percent mental._

I stopped, panting. exhilarated, feeling the pounding blood rushing through my body, circuiting from my legs to my heart then over again.

I reached my hands to the sky, watching the sunrise, enjoying the sweat rolling down my back. I felt strong again, revitalized with the world in the appearance of the sun.

I pulled out my headphones and sucked in the warm sunlight. I looked up, straight into so the sun. My vision turned white.

The bright light reminded of something.

_Running feet down a pale tile corridor. Clicking of nurses heels in the cold, sanitized room. Beeping of heart monitors. I opened my eyes to see a striking, red headed face. The green eyes, those eyes stayed with me._

I gasped at the memory.

_Screams of pain fill the air around me sometimes. At night I can't sleep. Their screams keep haunting me until I'm wide awake. The eyes are back, stroking my hair, soothing me into the night._

My mind has betrayed me. Precious memories, slipping through my fingers. Where did they come from? How? I can't comprehend. I take off running, back to the house.

_Then I'm screaming, red hot fire, cold dark night. Blue bruises and red marks. Green eyes comes back each time, telling me stories and lies, lies and stories. I believe the words she says._

I can see the forest again. I'm running faster, faster then before, but this time, the pain is not even nagging at my mind. I'm consumed, searching my mind for its hidden knowledge.

_It's dark again and the same green eyes are back. But it's a different person, a boy my age. He takes my hand and shows me a passageway. I look back at his eyes when I leave.  
_

I'm to the house now, and up the porch. I throw open the door and run into Zach, who's chest bumps into my head. I look up into the same green eyes.

_I run out of the prison, towards my __safety. They haven't noticed my absence yet. I'm almost to the clear. The red alarms blares behind me. I race faster, on and on._

'You were green eyes' I murmur in a daze. I'm pacing now, back and forth. Remember, remember. Come on, come on.

_I wake to a cold blanket of snow. I was running, and they were chasing. Now I'm here. Where? I keep climbing, I'm on a mountain. When they find me, they call a ride. I'm home now._

Why can't I remember? My brain has never failed me like this before. Confusion clouds Zach's face. 'What?'

'I remember. A time where I was captured by the Circle. You led me to a passage during the night and I escaped.' I say, I don't mention the part about his mother.

He looks puzzled for a moment. 'That hurt for a few days afterwards.' he says, wincing at the thought.

'Wait, you knew! You knew about this and you didn't tell me?' I exclaim, furiously.

'They'd wiped your memory so well, I can't even understand how you know this now.' he says. 'Besides, I don't even know the whole story. All I know about it was what Catherine my mother told me. She was obsessed with finding you. One night, whe showed me your tortured self. I helped you escape, becuase you reminded me of myself, captured and alone. I didn't know it was you until you reminded me of the time I helped one of the Circle prisioners escape.' He finishes, looking rather scared.

'Thanks. And thanks for taking a beating for me. I know the pain Catherine can inflict.'

He looks relieved. 'You'd better hurry inside. Joe's wearing holes in the carpet'

Entering the room, I see Zach's right. Joe paces back and forth, while Bex watches TV and Macey files her nails. In our room I see Liz hacking into some secure firewalls.

As I enter, Joe glares. 'Why didn't you leave a note? Where were you anyways?' he says, noting my apparel.

'Running. But that's not important now. I just remembered something. A flashback. I don't know how, or where, or anything. It just popped into my mind.'

They listen intently as I recall my time spent in the Circle's prison.

'They tortured you?' asks Joe.

'He saved you?' asks Macey.

'You were captured?' says Bex.

Nod. Yes.

The Chameleon's record has been broken, the perfect slate tarnished.

Liz puts a small hand on my arm. 'Your record isn't the most important thing Cam. You're safe, that's all that matters.'

Bex grins. 'Joey, now that Cam is back, we should have some fun!'

Joe glares at the use of his nickname.

Too late, Bex has already pulled me out the door.

Oh boy.

Pain is only relevant if it still hurts,  
I forget like an elephant, or we can use a sedative and go back to the day we fell in love just on our first kiss

**This chapter was inspired in part by the lovely Savi001! Thanks again!**

**Please review. I don't know what you thought about the remember thing and Zach and all the stuff. So tell me.**

**PS Zammie next chapter. (If it doesn't suck when I write it)**

**Thanks for all the review I already have! If this stoty gets up to 100 review... I don't even know! Ahhhhh! so please help out and thanks for all the help ****already!**

**Love my lovely readers and reviewers!**


	22. Chapter 22

Strawberries taste how lips do

And it's not complete yet

Mustn't get our feet wet

Cos that leads to regret

Diving in too soon

Little Bird by Ed Sheeran

_Bex grins. 'Joey, now that Cam is back, we should have some fun!'_

_Joe glares at the use of his nickname._

_Too late, Bex has already pulled me out the door._

_Oh boy._

Macey and Bex drag Liz and I down to a lake, which they had somehow discovered using complicated Global Coordinates and the NSA's database. Why couldn't they just use a map you ask? It's all part of the fun.

Macey tosses a bag at my head. I catch it as she shoo's me off towards the trees. 'Go change.'

Masking my irritation at the whole affair, I head off far, far away into the forest, to change in to the bikini Macey packed for me. She knows I hate bikini's. She's chosen light turquoise stripes with yellow ties. Despite the fact that she's used my favorite colors, I'm still not pleased. How hard would it be to just by me a Speedo and be done with it? Macey, however, obviously has other ideas about fashion, and since she insists, I let her buy my clothes for me. Just one more thing to worry about apparently.

I've changed now, and before I can make a run for it, Macey calls me down to the lake, where Bex has already plunged into the water. Liz just stands, still as a board, on the dock, wearing a pink 2 piece! Why her?

'Macey' I tell her, 'why did you pack me this swimming suit? You know I hate bikini's!'

At that, Macey looks at me with faux innocence. 'But Cammie dear,' she says, her voice like honey, 'we're expecting some very important visitors. I only want you to look your best.'

At that, I think I'm going to lose it. Slowly, I take deep breaths, and count to ten. Macey's face is pure evil, and behind her, still treading water, Bex grins a mischievous grin.

In a voice of deadly calm, I ask, 'Who exactly did you invite?'

Macey, attempting not to look guilty, (and utterly failing) says, 'Oh you know, just a few friends.'

'Friends my ass. You invited Zach didn't you?' I say, still fighting the urge to push Macey into the lake, then make a run for it.

'He looked so sad when we said we were going swimming, I just had to. Come on Cams, you don't mind do you?'

I opened my mouth, prepared to retort angrily, when Macey waved to someone. Turning, I saw Zach crossing the hill, followed by 2 other boys.

I muttered in a low voice to Macey, 'I promise to make your death short and quick if you tell me this is all a joke.'

She just grinned at me. 'Sorry Cammie, I've already got plans for my death.'

Plastering a fake look of pleasantry on my face, I sink to the ground at the edge of the lake, and dip my feet into the water. It's freezing cold from the late-September weather. I root myself to the spot. Somebody ought to stand guard, in case of attack. And there was no way I was going to swim in the water.

The boys have arrived at the edge of the dock. They pull of their shirts and dive right in, splashing around with Macey and Bex. One of the boys tries to coax Liz into the water, but eventually gives up, and joins her on the dock. Meanwhile, I am perfectly content to sit alone, and peaceful.

Zach pulls himself out of the water and walked over to my spot on the ground. Just as I was getting comfortable... He shakes himself off, managing to splash water on me in the process.

'You look a little lonely, sitting all by yourself,' he says, plopping down next to me on the bank.

'I'm fine,' I tell him. 'Somebody need to look out for more attackers.'

He looks at me. 'You don't let yourself have fun, do you Gallagher Girl?'

For some reason, his words don't sit well with me. 'Yes I do! I'm a very fun person!' I retort, angry at his assumptions.

He just smirks. 'OK, so you won't mind if I do this.'

And he picks me up and dumps me into the ice-cold water of the lake.

Oh he is so going to get it. Adjusting to the shock of the water against my skin, I hold my breath and swim under the dock, to the other side of the lake, making sure to go deep enough so he can't see me swimming. My head emerges to the side of the dock, shielding me from view. Liz and the boy (Jonas is his name) look up from their conversation. I motion for them to be quiet.

Meanwhile, Zach is still looking for me to emerge on the other side of the lake. He waits for a moment, then jumps back in the water, after he determines I'm not going to reappear. I watch as he dives down into the water.

Carefully making my way back to the other side of the lake, I wait until Zach's head re-emerges, and still submerged myself, grab his ankle and pull him under so swiftly, he doesn't make a sound.

Down, down, down. He's heavy, and he's strong. He tries to kick, but I avoid his flailing feet. I succeed in pulling him into the middle of the lake then come up for air. My head is spinning from the lack of oxygen and the effort of pulling him out to the middle.

I face him and grin. 'Think your so strong do you?'

He growls, 'I'm going to get you!'

I swim away as fast as I can.

We're off. I'm in the lead, arms moving as fast as I can, around the lake, Zach hot in pursuit. Bex and Macey catch on and soon, I'm cornered, Zach to one side, Bex behind me, Macey to my right and Grant right in front of me. There's one option left. I dive down, to the bottom. My ear pop with the pressure, and my head begins to hurt from the gallons of water pushing down on it. I can't let them win. I can't let them win.

My head feels fuzzy, I can't breathe. My lungs are going to burst.

I come conscious to pressure on my chest. Bex is pumping the water out of my lungs, doing CPR.

Then I realize something else Zach's lips are on mine, blowing air into my lungs. It's a nice sensation, and my water-logged ming doesn't comprehend the full reality of the situation for a moment.

My eyes fly open, and I start coughing.

I'm laying on the luscious grass, comforting me like a green blanket. Bex stops her compressions, and Zach hastily removes his face from the reach of my arms. Smart boy.

I sit up, and the world starts spinning.

'Cam, I wouldn't do that if I were you.' says Macey.

'Why?' I ask just as my head thuds back against the pillow of grass below my head.

Once I come to fully, Macey informs me that I spent nearly 5 minutes underwater, and when I finally floated to the surface, I was unconscious from lack of oxygen.

'But your better now,' she says, 'so the fun can continue'.

No one else seems to be bothered by the fact that I almost died.

Shrugging, I dive back into the water, and try to pretend that Zach's lips never touched mine. But they did, and I can't forget. Curse my spy like memory. As a girl, there's some things you just wish never happened.

Mouth to mouth with a cute boy is one of those things.

Bex splashes me, and brings down the wrath of Cammie. Soon, we've engaged in an all out splash war.

When I try to escape, Zach races after me, and scoops my legs out from under me. His strong arms propel into the cold water. I pull him in, and he nearly lands on top of me. We're face to face now, and Macey seems to take this as a sign of our obviously attraction to each other, which was the entire purpose of this little activity.

Zach kisses me on the cheek then dives under as I furiously sputter after him. He pops up grinning, behind Grant, using him as a shield.

'Bex,' I say, 'come help me get Zachary.'

'No.'

'Please'

'Nope.'

'Fine, I'll just have to do this myself, but you could have saved me a lot of time by helping!'

Zach spots me approaching him from across the water. He pales, then frantically swims to the other side, pulling himself out of the water and onto dry ground. Grinning, I chase after him. His wet swim trunks slow him down, while I speed ahead. Macey, I still wish I could have worn a speedo.

I catch up to him before he can escape over the hill, and tackle his back.

I pull him down, and he rolls back, down the him, on top of me. A jumble of limbs, all tumbling down towards the lake. We stop before we reach the dock.

Zach staggers to his feet, triumphantly holding me in his arms.

Macey and Bex couldn't be happier.

Strawberries taste how lips do

And it's not complete yet

Mustn't get our feet wet

Cos that leads to regret

Diving in too soon

**Guys, I really want to have a really Zammie first kiss type of thing, but I need help! I'm out of ideas for their ****relationship! Please help me! I'm begging you on my hands and knees.**

**Aside from my dramatics, Please Review!**

**And, as always, thanks to those lovely people who found 30 seconds to type nice words into a little box. I love you guys. **


	23. Chapter 23

Colors and promises  
How to be brave?  
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?  
But watching you stand alone  
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

A Thousand Years (Pt 2) by Christina Perri

Previously...

_I pull him down, and he rolls back, down the him, on top of me. A jumble of limbs, all tumbling down towards the lake. We stop before we reach the dock._

_Zach staggers to his feet, triumphantly holding me in his arms._

_Macey and Bex couldn't be happier._

We finally made our way up back to the house, where Joe is inside. As we approach the door, I hear a woman's voice, a familiar voice, a voice I've heard, but can't place.

Is my memory really getting so bad?

Zach is still beside me. I wish I could be mad at him, for some reason. He hasn't done anything wrong, but a feeling just pressures me. I'm so confused.

My world is slipping through my fingers, spinning out of my control.

I've never felt better.

I open the door, the sound of the ever-so-familar voice pulling me forward. Joe's sitting there, in the kitchen table, normal. Across from him, a woman.

Blonde hair, pulled into a messy bun, wrinkled clothes, no-make up, sleep deprived eyes, fatigued body.

She's gorgeous.

Her head turns to us as we enter the house. Her face turns to me.

Aunt Abby.

Bex and Macey and Liz recognize her from my pictures. I feel them stifffen beside me.

What's she doing here?

Joe senses the tension. 'Nice to talk to you. Glad the mission went well. I've got to go.' He finishes lamely, giving Abby a look.

I'm rooted to the spot.

Here she is. My blood family. The one who I've seen once. Once! She could have come, thousands of times, the times I left her messages, just to hear the voicemail go off again, and again. The small mechanical voice, nothing comparing to the sweet sound of her voice. _My mother had the same voice. _

Family. She could have been there. Our eyes meet across the room as she stands and crosses over to me.

'I'm sorry.'

Seems everyone is these days.

'I can't account for what I've done. I've never been there for you, I know you needed me. Hell, I need you.' her voice breaks. 'I know you have no reason to love me. But just know, I've regretted a lot of things in my life. But I still can't change the past.'

I just nod.

She seems to accept my unspoken signal.

The conversation drops as she limps out the door.

Bex: 'Cams, you OK'

Liz: 'Do what you think is best'

And Macey, oh Macey: 'Screw family, you've got us.'

I'm still alone.

The silence that pervades the house is awkward, at best. The Blackthorn boys are still here. Joe explains, 'I couldn't leave them behind Cam. They've got good hearts. The Circle could still try to get to them.'

The house is bursting.

By the time the night has fallen, I can't stand it. These four walls have stared me down all afternoon. I slip outside, feeling the open empty space spreading before me. The house snores behind me. I lay in the grass, feeling the wet stalks tickle my bare back. The deep velvet black is permeated by bright balls of light.

I spread out my arms, searching, as though I could fins something tangible and pull it towards me. As if I could be one with the world, instead of in the world.

I feel like going crazy. I've always held myself away from insanity. I never let myself choose that path, avoiding it.

Something has shifted.

Once you get to a point where you've lost too much, you just want something to fill up the holes.

The deep rumble of his voice as he plops next to me.

'Still up?'

He lays down next to me on the grass, hands behind his head in a cushion.

I turn my head, right ear pressing into the grass. I face him, studying his face as he gazes into the stars.

'Do you ever wish you were a star sometimes?' He asks.

'A star? Never.'

'Why?'

The crickets are singing nearby.

'You can't hide if you're a star. Everyone sees you. Everyone thinks about you. You are categorizes, filed into place. Stars, everyone tries to figure them out. And their too beautiful, too perfect. Something so perfect can't be real.'

Silence.

Sometimes silence fills the holes.

'You're real.' An afterthought, a whisper.

Then again, not every hole is filled.

Soft lips meet soft lips. Softly, sweetly. Reality.

He lays back onto the grass.

'Would you?' I ask.

'Would I what?'

'Be a star.'

He grins. 'Their so distant, so removed and cold. And unattainable. They see everything, all the world. ANd yet, no one every knows their true nature. Sure, we've come to understand what their made of. But material isn't everything. What a person's made from, that means nothing. It's who you become that matters.'

I have a feeling he isn't just talking about being a star.

'All the expectations,' he continues 'it's just too much. What if I just want to feel different. What if I just don't want to..'

He stops, realizing what he's said. Too much.

'You understand, don't you?'

I get to my feet.

I offer him my hand.

His questioning look is enough.

A wild rush has over come me. If I'm going to dance with danger, I may as well do it properly. I give myself over to my heart. My barriers have fallen down.

'Get up,' I tell him 'so I can kiss you properly.'

Colors and promises  
How to be brave?  
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?  
But watching you stand alone  
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow

**Here is my really long list of Excuses for Not Updating...**

**Yeah, its real long. Also, the same list for the reason I didn't study for my Chemistry test tomorrow. **

**Please Review to make me feel better about failing! **

**And I am really sorry I didn't update. But hey, review are really good incentive for people to write. Hint hint wink wink. **

**Also, was the Zammie OK? Not to OOC? **

**Tell me!**

**Now. **


	24. Chapter 24

Everybody's waiting  
Everybody's watching  
Even when you're sleeping  
Keep your ey-eyes open

Eyes Open by Taylor Swift

_A wild rush has over come me. If I'm going to dance with danger, I may as well do it properly. I give myself over to my heart. My barriers have fallen down._

_'Get up,' I tell him 'so I can kiss you properly.'_

Eyes open for the first time. The tragedy of life plays out on the stage of life, with everything according to script. My script, carefully planned, organized. Perfect.

Green eyes gaze down at me from the sky as he pulls my hand gently. Perfect.

Just one actor; something has slipped. I feel myself taking on the roles I'd never trained for. The uncertainty ahead of me, the human world lying, spread out like a map. Life always works out better on paper.

Paper can't write me feelings. Paper can't draw the way his eyes reflected the stars. Paper can't tell me what to do.

If I just lay here, will the world go on? Minutes pass, days fly, and the weeks turn to months and slowly to years. I've been lying in this grass my whole life. Rooted to this spot, a baby bird, not willing to leave the nest.

The audience watches with bated breath from the side. The choice is mine, the battle's rough, the time is here.

Feet don't fail me now, take me to the finish line.

I feel my feet moving.

Up, spinning in the darkness.

'What does it mean? What are we?'

Zach's nervous.

Take it slow, don't let the day get to ahead of you. I think. But what's the beauty of the day, if not for doing?

'We'll make it work. Us. If you want to. We'll take it slow.'

His face releases into a quick and easy smile, and he's got my feet off the ground and is holding me tight before I can decide to flip him over.

He kisses my head and sets me down. The world steadies under my feet, slowing its rotation. We're here, together, steady.

I've never been so unstable. I'm hanging from the cliff, grasping his hand. One way or the other. Down or up to safety.

'How long do you think until Joe kills me?' he asks.

'Don't know. Race you to the house?'

Flying feet, racing hearts, to the house.

Joe glares at Zach disapprovingly when we enter the house.

A spy's life.

We exchange looks and Joe backs off.

'Cammie, we need to talk. Zach, you come too.' Joe says.

Round the table, briefing papers are scattered.

'It's not safe here. We will be leaving soon, so be prepared for some quick travel.' he says.

'We? Who's coming?' I ask.

'The Circle is after you Cameron. You know as well as I who they target to get what they want. We're taking the girls. And we're leaving.'

His eyes fall upon Zach.

'I suppose we'll have to take him too, after certain... developments.' Joe glares pointedly at both of us.

'Sir,' Zach interjects, 'I don't mean to cause trouble... I just'

Joe cuts him off. 'Oh it's not Cammie I'm worried about. It's you. See, Rebecca Baxter has one mighty fine uppercut, or so I've heard.'

Joe seems almost pleased at the thought of Zach in the hospital.

'Don't call me Rebecca.'

And there they are, my girls. Hiding in the corner.

Joe winks at Bex. 'Thought I heard you come in. Nice job, I barely noticed your entrance. Good work ladies.'

He earns a slug in the arm from Bex.

'Pack now. Circle movements are hard to track and we are taking no risks. At all.'

One backpack, and a purse later, (and much to Macey's chagrin), we've packed. Joe promised Macey a shopping spree after the nasty business was over. She winks at me behind Joe's back-sticking to her cover until the end.

The car is inconspicious, compared to the speedy motercycles and flashy sports cars filling Joe's garage. Each to his own, I suppose.

'I call shotgun!' Bex races to the front, oddly eager to sit front seat.

Then I see why.

'Looks like we'll have to share, Gallagher Girl.' Zach smirks.

I squish into the back, sitting on Zach's knees in the 3 person back seat. Macey, Bex and Liz exchange winks. Bless them, they do try.

Joe doesn't look to happy with the seating arrangements.

'Cover: we're sticking to the basics I'm Cammie's dad and you are her friends, driving down for a holiday trip. Got it?'

He glares in towards the backseat.

'Sir, yes sir.'

He backs out of the garage, into the dark night.

We drive.

And drive.

And drive.

'Are we there yet?' I ask like a child.

'No.'

'Where are we going?' Bex this time.

'No.'

'Will there be food?' Zach.

'No.'

It occurs to me the coordinates of Joe's house weren't on the CIA database, as I had checked before coming to Blackthorn. My sense of direction blocked by both the night and the lack of information, I press my face to the window and let the cool glass soothe my checks.

The lights are too close, too bright, too obvious.

'You know we're being followed, right Joe?'

'Yes.'

Everybody's waiting  
Everybody's watching  
Even when you're sleeping  
Keep your ey-eyes open

**First off: Thank you so much! All the reviews? I need 9 more then I have 100! Ahhhhh**

**What do you guys want to happen next? I value suggestions...**

**Sorry for my loserness in not posting. Finals are in like... 2 weeks and I have 2 AP tests and stuff so my time has been... non-existent. **

**Thanks for reading and putting up with me!**

**Love you all! **

**Please review. **


	25. Chapter 25

It's alright to cry, even my dad does sometimes

So don't wipe your eyes, tears can remind you of life

_Hold On by Ed Sheeran_

_The lights are too close, too bright, too obvious._

_'You know we're being followed, right Joe?'_

_'Yes.'_

My bum is starting to hurt. Hey, Zach's knees are not great for the bones. Trust me. We've been driving Joe's Toyota for the past 3 hours and the cramped backseat is made even more uncomfortable by my presence on Zach's lap.

On the road, Joe was pushing his car to the limits, without being too obvious. The winding road twisted and turned through an unfamiliar dark forest and the same pair of headlights shone through the night behind our car. I still had no idea where the final destination was, as the stars were obscured by the roof ahead. Joe sat silent like a statue, brow furrowed and pedal to the metal as he drove along. Bex, in the passangers side was knocked out with her feet in the dashboard.

Macey was sleeping peacefully against the window, Liz's head on her shoulder.

They seemed nearly normal, like a group of friends driving back from a late night outing.

Zach's chest cradled my head as I rested gently back on his muscled shoulder. His head rested on mine and we fell into a graceful harmony of breath. The rise and fall of his chest was comforting- like the steady beat of a drum, assuring me the worst things in life were still overshadowed by the great.

I stare out the window and wait. Waiting for the inevitable, for the time when we would confront… Them.

I had a sinking suspicion I knew who it was.

I thought she had died, I was there.

But something inexpressible kept me from accepting her death, something lurking deep inside my mind told me to be weary.

On and on we drive, deep into the velvet night. I'm so tired, so tired. So tired.

And I wake to Joe's frantic voice, urging me to wake.

'Run.' He says, pulling Macey and Bex out of the car.

'Run.' He says, helping Liz to her feet and nearly pushing her after Macey and Bex.

'Run' He says, and he squeezes me tight.

'Keep her safe.' He looks at Zach.

Do I look like chopped liver? The Chamelon may just be the best spy in junior operative history, but she can't handle herself in a mad dash to safety? I think not.

But there's no time to argue the finer points of my abilities. The skidding of tires behind me tells us the time to go has long passed.

Zach pushed me forward and I run, conscious of his fingers lingering at my back as he urges me onward, away from the dark-clad figures chasing our shadows.

And Joe's behind, fighting off the first of the attackers. Zach pushes me forward as I slow, wanting to help.

'You know what they want.' He says, and I can't argue with logic. Because it's true and I know it is.

I push on. Zach seems to know where we are headed, though I've never been this way before. The terrain is unfamiliar to my feet. Up ahead I see Bex and Macey pull Liz into the cover of the trees.

'There!' Zach points and I'm guided to the edge of the forest. Behind me, Joe is still holding back the enemy agents.

'Go help!' I want to push Zach away from me. How could he stand by and watch as Joe is being attacked?

'I can't, Gallagher Girl. I've gotta stay with you.'

'No. It's not worth it for Joe to be attacked. I'm right behind you.' His reluctance is overcome by my sheer force of will as we turn and race back up the hill.

But Joe, sensing our approach, yells louder than ever before:

'Remember your promise!'

Zach's face is set and he slings me over his shoulder and runs, full speed down the hill and towards the woods.

Joe watches us recede, with me still draped over Zach's shoulder. He turns to face the approaching agents.

Bex beckons us to safety, but I can't see through my tears as I watch the swarm of fists surrounding Joe thicken.

I pound Zach's back, my fists balled, but the energy has drained from my body, leaving me unable to muster the energy to fight.

Zach pushes on, trying to get me out of the field of vision.

But it's too late.

I watch as Joe is pulled away, limp and unconscious.

The tears stream down my checks unashamedly.

The black line of agents files back up the hill, receding into cars like a line of ants, carrying their food to the queen bee.

When he finally puts me down, Zach's strong arms surround me and I bury my face in his chest. When I look up, his eyes read my sadness.

He looks away slowly.

'Come on. I know the way.'

It's alright to cry, even my dad does sometimes

So don't wipe your eyes, tears can remind you of life

**Too many people started to like Joe so I had to... remove him. Mwahaha. #sorrynotsorry**

**Anyways... Long updating will be fixed in... less than 17 more days! Celebrate because I have summer vacation :)**

**Also.. I have nearly 100 review at this ****point. ERMHGAD... I am fangirling over this. So help me raise it to 100 because I know how mad you guys are about Joe being kidnapped.**

**Also, if you have any plot twists or ideas, just let be know! I will incorporate them. Promise :) And maybe I will respond to your reviews next time!**

**Thanks for reading as always. It's great to feel loved that so many people have read this story. It's crazy actually. **

**Have a great week (Hope its better than mine)**


	26. Chapter 26

Come on take a walk on the wild side

Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain

You like your girls insane...

Choose your last words,

This is the last time

Cause you and I

We were born to die

'Born To Die' by Lana Del Rey

**Just a note, this song is great, but not entirely applicable to the following chapter. But, I couldn't figure out any better-fitting lyrics so enjoy.**

_I watch as Joe is pulled away, limp and unconscious._

_The tears stream down my checks unashamedly._

_The black line of agents files back up the hill, receding into cars like a line of ants, carrying their food to the queen bee._

_When he finally puts me down, Zach's strong arms surround me and I bury my face in his chest. When I look up, his eyes read my sadness._

_He looks away slowly._

_'Come on. I know the way.'_

We've trudged along the path for hours it seems. Zach is leading the group, pulling my hand as I slowly plod behind him.

I've given up looking where we're going. I trust Zach to see me through, but more than that, I just don't care. It seems better to be trapped by bars then by the mental torture I'm confined to. If the Circle appeared, right now, right here, would I let them take me away?

Zach, I know would fight to the end for me. Bex, Liz, Macey, all would sacrifice their freedom for my safety, and I for them.

But what if I wanted to be captured, to have a chance of seeing Joe? To taste the bittersweet thrill of action, and the agony of confinement. Now, anything seems better than the hollow shell of my body.

Zach turns to check on me, every so often. His eyes are filled with concern, but my apathetic hand, so tiny in his, can't find the will to return his comforting squeeze.

I'm so confused, and frustrated. And lost and lonely. I'm stumbling in the dark, and there's no one to lead me out.

I'm shaken from my reverie by Zach's deep, melodic voice telling me to get down.

I drop to my belly and army crawl along the forest floor, until we reach the edge of a clearing. Bex squeezes my shoulders as she lines up beside me and we stare at the imposing Manor not half a mile away. The familiar outline of the grounds and buildings of Gallagher remind me of much less confusing times. Of day's when my place in this world was cemented to my identity.

'Zach' I hiss in the silence. 'How did you know about this?'

I'm shocked out of my shell just for a moment, contemplating the possibility of a person with more knowledge of Gallagher than myself. I never would have thought it possible, by then again, I never would have believed I'd find a father and a boyfriend in a few short months.

Times change.

'Joe took me here once. Long story, but essentially he needed something from the Subs and was prepared to break and enter to find it. I stood guard for him and we escaped along this path. He said he'd discovered it in his youth while trying to enter Gallagher the first time.'

And the surprises are still unfolding.

'If we hug those trees, we can enter the grounds unseen. The Circle has knowledge of the school's whereabouts, so you can bet they'll have eyes and ears waiting. But if we get inside, we can warn the Headmistress.'

The plan seems to have many holes, but at my look of unease, Zach merely shrugs, 'It's our best hope.'

Sadly, he's right.

Advancing forward, we carefully move, avoiding the traps and snares cleverly hidden in the woods to stop unwanted strangers. Like hopping from stone to stone across a pond, we finally make our way to the back entrance of our school.

Liz breathes a sigh of relief.

'The fun isn't over yet Lizzy.' I say, my voice flat and monotone.

She shoots me a concerned look.

Liz disables the alarm on the back door and we sneak into the dark hallways near the kitchen. The chef is probably preparing breakfast right now, as we've driven through the night. Perhaps we could sneak some bannanas? But the eerie silence disarms me more than anything. Its too quiet, too still for the early morning. Even in a school of spies, 500 teenage girls can't be that quiet.

'Something's wrong' Bex hisses and I nod in agreement.

'Take the secret passageways.' And with that, I'm back to my natural element.

'Let's head to our suite.' I whisper to Macey, Bex and Liz. Zach stands, almost awkwardly, still not fully grasping the situation. It's a girl thing, I must say.

Grabbing his hand, I move 53 steps down the hallway until we reach an air vent. Bex boosts me silently and, after handing down the grate to Macey, I hoist myself in using my core muscles alone. Our routine is flawless, like a machine. Countless years of practice breaking the rules. Hooking my feet on either side to stabilize myself, I reach down and pull Liz into the belly of the shaft. Her tiny form slids down the tube, and she lies flat to avoid constant claustrophobic attacks. Next is Macey, boosted by Bex. She pulls herself up, and then Bex appears.

By now the small air shaft is nearly completely full.

'Go!' I whisper to Liz, the first in line. 'I'll get Zach and catch up.'

I gesture to Zach, motioning for him to join us.

His hesitancy amuses me, as he looks worried about something.

'Come on,' I say. 'It's not too bad in here.'

Zach is so tall he barely needs to jump to reach the ceiling. After pulling himself in and securing the vent, I pull him further into the shaft.

Hands and knees know the way, my familiar terrain. On missions, I'm the smallest and most physically capable and so I get the "monkey" jobs. But I don't mind. The tight walls don't bother me, nor does Zach's comforting presence behind me.

Ahead, I hear the muffled sound of Bex and Macey, guiding Liz along the path of the vent. At least she's good at Research and Development.

The girls are ahead of us, and they enter the room first. Zach, before we enter the room, puts a gentle hand on my waist, effectively stopping me in mid-crawl.

'Cammie' he whispers. 'If anything happens, you need to leave. The Circle want you. Well, they want me too, but you more. They've been hunting you and they won't stop. Promise me that you'll stay safe. Okay?'

I kiss him quickly and he chuckles in the back of his throat. 'You can't change my mind with a kiss.'

'You sure about that?'

I lean in.

Below, the crack of a gunshot fires and I'm engulfed in blackness.

Come on take a walk on the wild side

Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain

You like your girls insane...

Choose your last words,

This is the last time

Cause you and I

We were born to die

**Oh boy... the suspense is really, really killing me. **

**Do not worry, I will update ASAP! **

**Reviews that made my day (I checked these in my government class hehe)**

**meghan424644: I'm really glad that you are showing so much interest in my story. If you must know, your review kinda made me want to write more, because you really seemed anxious about it! Thanks for understanding the Joe decision. It will get... more interesting. Only hints :)**

**AinsleyWright: Thanks for always reviewing my stories and encouraging me to update! I really like reviews :) Hope the Joe thing didn't keep you in too much suspense. Sorry bout that. But keep reading for more... information**

**And thanks to all the other review which I have ****received! I have offically reached the magical number of 100! thats 10 times 10!**

**Woot woot! Party **

***lana del rey plays in background***

**I hear that 15 times 10 equals 150. Wanna find out? Review! **

**(Meaning, I want to get 150 reviews. Next goal)**

**PS suspenseful chapters are only updated if review happen :)  
**


	27. Chapter 27

Stay stay stay.

I've been loving you for quite some time time time.

'Stay' by Taylor Swift

'Cammie'_ he whispers. 'If anything happens, you need to leave. The Circle want you. Well, they want me too, but you more. They've been hunting you and they won't stop. Promise me that you'll stay safe. Okay?'_

_I kiss him quickly and he chuckles in the back of his throat. 'You can't change my mind with a kiss.'_

_'You sure about that?'_

_I lean in._

_Below, the crack of a gunshot fires and I'm engulfed in blackness._

Green eyes meet blue in the silence following the crack of a bullet. Silence. The sound is harsh, cruel, bitter and terrifying. These walls, a haven for the hunted, the protection of the innocent. The sanctuary has been breached.

Low groans of pain can be heard from below, and I don't know which is worse- the silence or the pain.

Zach's pushing me forward, trying to save me from the sound of someone... anyone below, suffering.

'Stay here.' he whispers as we reach the exit to the my room.

'No.'

'Please? For me?'

'No.' And with that, I kick open the grate and drop into the room, feet landing in a crouch.

Behind me, Zach thuds to the ground.

Head spins.

It's nearly too much to comprehend. Below, I see Bex lying on the ground, blood gushing from her leg. And Liz is there, arm twisted, and Macey, blood coming from a gash in her head.

Zach's strong arms around my waist hold me back, and his calloused hand muffled my scream.

The sound has gone out of the world. My ears are filled with the continual sound of the bullet, tearing through Bex's leg. I hear the snap of Liz's fragile bone and sense Macey's fall to ground. I scream into Zach's hand, louder, and louder and soon my ears have gone numb from the sound of the guilt pouring into my heart.

_It should have been me, it should have been me._

Above me, a red headed women stands, tall and victorious. Those green eyes, so right, but so wrong, like the slits of a snake, staring cruelly into my soul. Looking down at me as I sink into Zach's arms.

It's her.

The cocked gun in her hands is what pushes me over the edge.

Bursting from Zach's arms, I attack like a wild animal, but worse. My anger fuels me, and I lunge between Zach and his mother. The tear of a bullet through my arm? I move forward, nearing my target.

My eyes are red, flames, ready to burst into new life.

'This time, I'll make sure you die.' The snarl that escapes my lips cannot belong to anyone by me, but the unfamiliar sound brings the roar of the world back into my mind. The feral tiger, released from the cage.

Leg bleeds, lung punctured.

The bullets rest inside my body, numbing the pain into anger.

The gun is in my hand, and pointed at her head.

Finger on the trigger, mind in auto-pilot. Lower, lower, lower.

Zach's cry behind me stops my finger.

'No.'

It's muffled, and desperate.

Our eyes lock.

'Allow me the honor.'

'She's your mother.'

His face stops any more questions. He walks towards me and I move aside, allowing him a clear shot, towards the heart lying on the floor.

The gun is handed over, and Zach stares into the eyes of the woman who created him.

Blood bubbles from her mouth, her beautiful face is marred by the expression of evil twisting her features. Green eyes, so cold, so hard.

'You are no son of mine. Never were.'

She spits, but the blood splats onto the floor.

The trigger is pressed. Lower and lower.

Crack.

'What have I done?' The anger drains from my body like the blood from Catherine's face.

Black, stars. My body screams in pain, remembering injuries I'd prviously ignored. They scream for my attention, as Zach calls me to him.

Stay stay stay. But the pain over bears my mind and I slip away, into oblivion.

Stay stay stay.

I've been loving you for quite some time time time.

Oh dear...

Well as usual, thanks for reading and reviewing and please continue of support me and this story, which is the first one I've ever written. Not quite sure how it's gonna all work out but it will be epic :)

Thanks, and I love you all!


	28. Chapter 28

Explosions,

On the day you wake up needing somebody.

Its ok to be afraid but it will never be the same.

Explosion by Ellie Goulding

_The trigger is pressed. Lower and lower._

_Crack._

_'What have I done?' The anger drains from my body like the blood from Catherine's face._

_Black, stars. My body screams in pain, remembering injuries I'd previously ignored. They scream for my attention, as Zach calls me to him._

_Stay stay stay. But the pain over bears my mind and I slip away, into oblivion._

White. Red. Black.

The colors of the world spin when I open eyes. The blacks bleed into whites, and red bleeds from my chest, wrapped in white.

The blotch of scarlet is painfully obvious within the microcosm of colors around me.

Time has moved ahead of me, it seems. Never, for once, slowing its inexorable pace to compensate. Time, the greatest thief of all, slipping between cracks and avoiding capture. The morning light stares through the window next to me.

The white walls, white floor, white ceiling, white light pouring into the room remind me of heaven, the stories people tell of the afterlife. But the red robin fluttering nearby chirps and I'm back to reality.

Perhaps being dead would not be so bad.

The pain stabs at my lungs, arms, leg. I feel the air pulsing through the opposite sides of my chest, the hole there gaping like chasm. My blood freezes at the contact. The wheezing sound of my breath is loud, painful. Much different than the smooth purr of the once-catlike creature of the recent past.

To my right, black hair spills across a pillow, and short blonde hair spreads like a halo around Liz's face. Bex paces, limping slightly.

My eyes meet hers.

Tears fill her eyes as she rushes to my side, silently, to not wake the others.

'Oh Cam.' she whisper, and my tears come, as I feel her pain.

'It should have been me.'

The gleaming waterfall on her dark cheeks thickens, pouring down her checks. The drops splatter to white linen, wet splotches landing on my lap as I sit, Bex on the edge of my bed.

'No.' her conviction os stronger than my will to fight. I lay back on the pillows propping up my back.

'Where is everyone? Where are we? What's happened?'

A low, mournful chuckle escapes her.

'You've been out for 2 days Cam.'

2 day? Oh God, it's been so long. The magnitude sinks in, the missing time I can never recover.

Beside me, Macey stirs, and sleepily opens her eyes. At my reinvigorated figure, her shriek sends the birds flying outside. Liz wakes, and Zach races into the room.

Ignoring the alert spy standing in ready position, Macey throws her arms around me, ignoring the holes and bandages.

Inwardly I wince, trying to remain calm on the exterior.

'You are finally awake! God, what took you so long?'

'She was shot 3 times, and nearly drowned in her own lung fluid. It a miracle she's still alive. She was this close,' at this Zach's voice cracks. 'This close to dying.'

'Don't get you panties in a wad, I was only kidding!' Macey retorts, rolling her eyes, but none the less, returning to her own bed. "Boys", she mutters behind Zach's back.

I stifle a giggle.

Zach's hand holding my good arm shakes every so slightly, whether from exhaustion or anxiety, I can't tell.

The momentary haze evaporates, and I shoot to my feet.

'Catherine, Joe, Gallagher, the girls!'

I collapse as Zach catches me. The effort of standing sends my brain back into darkness again, but I fight the colors and pray for the light. My vision clears eventually, and Bex's worried face peered at me, Zach's green eyes concerned.

This whole 'concerned' thing never happened before. I'm losing my touch.

'No standing, Doctor's orders.' They both say in unison, like a practiced speech.

'Fine. What happened?'

'Well...' Zach looks uneasily around at the other girls. I slid my foot subtly to the floor.

'If you don't tell me, I swear I will find out myself. Right. Now.'

Inside, I highly doubt my ability to take 4 steps, but the threat hangs over the silence.

Bex begins. 'After we got into the grate, we headed back to our room, where I got down first. I didn't look- I was stupid, and Catherine shot my leg. She had two other goons with her, and I think they thought I was you Cam, because she was not aiming to kill. But they didn't count on Lizzy and Mace here to swoop in after they got me.'

Liz continues, ' We got down and Bex was staggering against the wall. We had heard the shot, and knew we had to get Bex out of there. I got one of the big guys by landing on him with a boost from the vent, and kicking his temple. Macey went for the other one, but Catherine was still here, with her gun. She couldn't shoot me, because I rolled near her goon, but once she had holstered it, she came after me.' Liz's shoulders tense, adn she holds her arm tighter to her chest. 'She grabbed my arm and twisted, and, well, you see how it is now. She broke it.'

Macey pats Liz's cast. 'Don't worry Lizzy, we'll get 'em back! You'll be up and kicking some bad guy ass in no time. Now where were we? Oh yeah, so the guy I was fighting was not completely stupid (sadly), and he kicked my forehead with metal in his heel. And that.' she says, pointing to her head bandage, 'is why I will be wearing bangs for the rest of my life. To cover up the scar.'

'Guy,' I start to say.

But they cut me off.

'Don't even go there.' Bex growls. 'For the last time, it was our choice, we hold no blame to you for any of our injuries, and never will. Don't feel guilty. At all.'

'And that's an order.' Macey says.

'Sir yes sir.' I reply weakly. But the pound of guilt that had been sinking in my heart feels lighter, as if it's been lessened. But the pangs are still there.

Zach's green eyes meet mine.

'After I dropped down, you were so mad, I could barely hold you back. And that was before... well before she started talking.' He spits out the word 'she' like poison in his mouth.

'Once you attacked, I thought I would to crazy. Then she shot you and, well, that was the final straw. When I saw you had the gun, I was ready. I was ready to end her, to end the connection between us. To end the life of a miserable excuse for a mother, a person, a creature. She is the lowest of the low, and I know she will rot in hell. I need to spare your soul from the red of killing someone, because, well, she'd already stolen mine, so the favor was mutual.'

He glares at his shoes, not meeting my eyes.

Macey discretely shoes the others from the room.

But it's worse that he did it. That he spared me the deed, but left me the guilt. I felt my hand clench again around the barrel of the gun, and felt the impact of bullet ripping through flesh. But he had used his soul in replace of mine, killing his mother to protect my "innocence". I feel the guilt, for causing him pain. Despite his claims of hatred, the basic human connection between family condescends all feeling. And he killed her.

'I'm sorry.' But it's not me who whispers the words, its him.

And he turns and walks away, leaving me swimming with questions.

Explosions,

On the day you wake up needing somebody.

Its ok to be afraid but it will never be the same.

Next chapter, some truths will be revealed :)

Dear RidingAngelxspy: your review didn;t show up for a while... odd! But thanks for making this story make it to 100 reviews! I will be sure to fill you in on sneak peaks... (but that requires planning and I prefer writing stories as I go, with a general plot line structured).

Poll: Should Zammie continue or... should it break up then get back togther?

The choice is up to you. So review!

Thanks


	29. Chapter 29

Don't make me sad, don't make me cry

Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough

I don't know why

Keep making me laugh

"Born to Die" by Lana Del Rey

_But it's worse that he did it. That he spared me the deed, but left me the guilt. I felt my hand clench again around the barrel of the gun, and felt the impact of bullet ripping through flesh. But he had used his soul in replace of mine, killing his mother to protect my "innocence". I feel the guilt, for causing him pain. Despite his claims of hatred, the basic human connection between family condescends all feeling. And he killed her._

_'I'm sorry.' But it's not me who whispers the words, its him._

_And he turns and walks away, leaving me swimming with questions._

At this point, running after him like a princess is simply out of the question. First there is the small matter of the hole in my lungs, and secondly, I'm just too tired to deal with it.

I drift back into sleep, where the world can't get to me with their guns and kicks. I dream of a golden meadow, flowers gleaming with diamonds, and robins made of ruby.

I wake into the real world. The darkness around me unsettles my vision, and the pain throbbing in my chest fills the black with red as I try to sit up.

My freshly changed bandages splatter with red. I stare down at my chest, at the new bandage. The red reminded me of the robins in my dream, so bright and powerful. The contrast starkly outlines the wound, and the seeping red spreads out, further and further in a inching dance of life, draining out my time.

I gasp, still enraptured and stare at my chest.

From my side, Zach starts, awakening from his sleep in the chair next to me.

'Hey Gallagher Girl.'

'Hey.'

'Look what happened, how about we just don't talk about it? Forgive and forget?' he says, avoiding my eyes.

'Sure, whatever.'

He kiss me, then notices the patch of red spreading across my chest.

'Damn it! Again?' I wonder how many hours he's been here. The though makes me feel better. I squeeze his had, glad for his warmth in the cold white room.

'Nurse! Patient 7 needs help!' He looks nearly frantic as he presses the intercom button near my bed.

'I'm fine, really. It's just a little blood.'

He only shakes his head. 'It's not like that. You've been out for 3 days, and your bandages haven't lasted for more than 2 hours at max. You're on blood transfusions just to keep you filled with blood. They didn't want me to tell you this, but they've been keeping you on sleeping pills so they can figure it out. Its an internal problem, one they've never seen.'

'What? That can't be possible! I've only been asleep for... well a few hours!'

He smiles sadly, the whites of his eyes tinged with red.

'You've been here the whole time?' I whisper, as the nurses descend upon me in a wave.

My hand is pulled from Zach's fingers, needle inserted into my arm, and shot injected into veins.

Before the world fades away again, I hear his voice.

'Always.'

This time, my mind keeps me caged while the nightmares attack from behind. There's no escape, though I push and push at the walls of my prison. And then the pain comes and it's all I know.

I curl up into a shell, as though it can protect me some how. I feel a raw primal scream nearby but the sound is lost in the whirl of the ocean in my own mind.

The pain consumes me, and my lungs are burning and the darkness is a relief when it finally comes.

Awareness returns after endless pain subsides somewhat. My mind calls my soul back, but I'm not ready to leave my cave.

Loud voices, above me head. Flying words, my name mixed in the lot. I wish they would just leave me to die in peace.

When I open my eyes, all I see are a pair of green eyes.

Zach relaxes instantly. He's more disheveled then ever, hair out of place, eyes blood shot, clothes rumpled.

He's never looked so gorgeous, standing over my bedside.

'Out with it. What's the matter with you?' I ask.

He shakes his head.

'You nearly died, at least 4 times in the last,' he checks his watch,' 2 days, and your asking me what my problem is? Geez woman!' But he smiles still the same, settling heavily on the edge of my bed.

'The almighty Zachary Goode would never let a hair on his head get out of place, not for anything. Besides, I nearly die a lot. But I'm not dead yet, so I must be doing something right.'

'I swear you will be the death of me.'

I grin. 'As long as I ever shall live.'

He kisses my check gently.

'So why's all this shit still on me?' I gesture to the thousands of tiny tubes injected into my body.

'That, darling, is up to the damn doctors. When they decide you can be released, you are free to go. But I have a feeling they want to talk to you. You still have some... problems.'

'Don't we all?' I say wearily. 'After all the pain I went though you'd think the least they could do would be to unchain me so I can at least pea.'

'You must be feeling better, then.' He grins.

'I've faced worse, though I'm told childbirth trumps being shot a thousand times over.'

'I'm sure I could fix that.' He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.

'Dear God, save me.' I slap his arm (playfully), but being a fully trained operative, well let's just say he's lucky I love him.

He tickles my stomach, under all the tubes, and I giggle in a very un-professional manner.

'Did I just hear the famous Cammie Morgan, master of all spies, the world renowned Chameleon laugh?' He says in fake surprise.

'Yes,' I snap, 'if you know what's good for you, you will step away from the Chameleon. She may be about to die, but even then, she's still knows how to kill a man in nearly 50 ways, using her bare hands.'

Zach nervously side steps back to his vigil at the bedside chair.

'Thanks.'

'You know what Gallagher Girl, you are one heck of a scary woman. Remind me never to get on your bad side.'

'Will do babe.'

The clicking of shoes reminds me of the throbbing in my lung.

The white lab coat appears, along with the face of Dr. Johnson, clutching a clipboard in her hand.

'Cameron, now that your awake, I'd like to inform you of some of the medical procedures you have undergone over the last few days. Now, as you know, you were shot in three places: the arm, the leg and the bottom of your left lung. The arm and leg wounds we were able to heal relatively quickly, with little pain on your part, but your lung was severely punctured, and sustained terrible damage. We've had to drain the fluid multiple times. We followed standard procedure for such a wound but each time, the wound would re-open and bleed continuously. Closer examination revealed traces of snake venom which prevented your blood from clotting, resulting in continual bleeding. The bullet was tipped with poison.'

I just sit.

'You've had about 15 pints of blood transfused, which was the minimum we could give you. For most of the time, Zach here has been watching your wound, to warn us of re-opening. The poison was eventually,' she glares at Zach at this point, ' removed from your blood, though you will be weak for several weeks afterwards. We won't be able to unhook you for another 2 days, and after that, you will be closely watched to ensure no further damage is sustained. Any questions?'

'No, thank you Doctor.' I say politely smiling at the woman who saved my life.

'My pleasure. Thanks you for your excellent service.'

And she exits the partitioned room, leaving me in silence.

'No missions for 2 weeks! This is horrible!' I say, while Zach mutters under his breath.

'What was that?'

'I said, I'm gonna kill her for hurting you.'

I look at him.

'I thought Catherine was dead! I saw you kill her! I saw it!'

'So did I, but somehow, Cam, she's still out there, and she's mad.'

Don't make me sad, don't make me cry

Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough

I don't know why

Keep making me laugh

**I'm back, did you miss me :)**

**Please review. I kept Zammie if you didn't notice.**

**Thanks for the reviews I got- they were ****awesome! The universal opinion supported Zammie so Zammie it is!**

**Question: What made you start reading this story in the first place?**

**Love you all!**


	30. Chapter 30

The paths have been crossed  
The crumbs are gone and the way, and the way is lost  
Melancholy phantoms eye our skins  
Poison apples falling with the wind

Hear the sigh of the trees  
Those who enter here never leave

And the rangers stream out of their cabins  
They are the hunters  
We are the rabbits  
Maybe we don't want to be found  
Maybe we don't want to be found

Rangers by A Fine Frenzy

**(It's long, but I started writing this chapter and Pandora popped this song up and the lyrics were supper cool and metaphoric and awesome and I couldn't resist. Sorry)**

'I said, I'm gonna kill her for hurting you.'

I look at him.

'I thought Catherine was dead! I saw you kill her! I saw it!'

'So did I, but somehow, Cam, she's still out there, and she's mad.'

**2 weeks later...**

As I sit on the poolside, feet making ripples in the cool blue water, my mind wonders far far away. It's been 2 weeks 2 weeks since I became fully conscious after my "incident". They've been keeping me very busy here at Gallagher, trying transparently to keep my mind off the events of the last month. The girls all look at me with a mixture of pride and pity as I pass, some condescending and some idolizing. Both serve to annoy me, as I simply try to walk in solitude.

It's been 2 weeks, and I've had entirely too much time to think. Zach and the girls, of course, couldn't be my companions non-stop. 3 days after the doctor confirmed I was still sane, the Director sent them on a mission, excluding me. Apparently their own injuries healed faster than mine.

I know why I'm here -their worried for my sanity. There seems to be a prevalent notion flying around that a person can only handle so much. Still haven't reached my limit.

But 'it's for the best'. The mission, though highly secretive, is attempting to find Joe. And emotions, as always, are the death of a spy. So I sit, and wait, here in my home, alone in the sea of girls, wishing I was anywhere but my once heaven.

When they walked out the door, I think a piece of me died, or at least shrunk. I tried to push it off as worry, but who am I kidding? The biggest blow was to my pride.

It was watching you best friends walk off with your man, while you sat alone, chained to the spot.

I knew I was being overly dramatic. I knew the truth.

But I couldn't seem to accept the facts- I missed a mission with my team.

A girl taps my shoulder from behind. 'Headmistress Buckingham would like to see you. Her office.'

As the girl left, I grumble quietly to myself.

'Now what? 'Polish the floors?' 'Babysit some 6th graders?' God that woman has me working like a slave around here.' I say aloud to the air as I pick up my crutches. 'Stupid crutches, I don't need these things.'

I chuck the metal traps of death into the pool with a loud splash, disturbing some 6th graders who look at me as though I've lost my mind.

Maybe I have.

I stalk grouchy into the Gallagher Academy, barely concealing my anger.

I mount the stairs.

What was wrong with me? I mentally shake myself. Why was I being so unprofessional?

At the office door, I don't even bother to knock, knowing the camera's outside her door are well monitored.

'Morgan here, how can I help you this fine morn...'

I'm cut off by the strong embrace and soft lips of none other than Zachary Goode.

I seem to have forgotten how a pair of strong arms feels, the way they chase away the worry and the pain. I don't think I can ever go back from this.

Then Bex is pulling him off my, claiming he's had his fair share, and Macey's glaring over my shoulder at him as she nearly squeezes my eyes out. Liz's tiny arms circle my waist as she gives me a hug.

'Damn you! You want to know just how long I was alone in this place, by myself? 1 week, 4 days, 3 hours and 36 minutes. Yeah I was that desperate I counted the minutes. You want to know how many miniscule and useless chores this woman' I point accusingly at Professor Buckingham, 'made me do? Yeah, you don't that's right.'

'Missed you too.' They chorus.

I give them the Morgan glare for a moment, then, assured that they were truly penitent, then turned to Buckingham, who had barely looked up at the exchange.

'Professor, you needed me?'

'You're able, I suppose, to walk, run etc.?'

'More than capable'

'I suppose you would have told that my even if you were bedridden on your deathbed, but I know how important this is you you.' she sighs inwards. 'Against my better judgement, I'm allowing you to... accompany these agents on their next mission.'

'And what is defied as "accompanying" exactly' I ask innocently.

She nearly rolls her eyes. 'Your not officially on the mission, though you may assist in MINOR activities only. Zachary will be closely monitoring your actions. The Director has approved this himself. Agents Baxter, McHenry and Sutton will be responsible for your briefing.'

'Yes Headmistress.'

As we walk out the door, I whisper quietly in Zach's ear. 'Monitor my ass. If you so much as think about suggesting I stay behind, I assure you your death will be long and painful.'

'Yes Gallagher Girl.'

If Professor Buckingham expected an official "briefing", she would be severely disappointed upon entering the scene of our "briefing session".

Pizza boxes littered the floor, nails were painted, music blared, and 17 and Vogue copies littered the floor.

In short, it was a party.

Zach had been scared off as soon as Macey had mentioned the word "sleepover".

Smart boy that one, knowing Macey must have been enough never to underestimate the power of a teenage girl.

After we'd eaten our heart's content, and sung along to our favorite songs, I received my "briefing" which should have properly been termed as a "As-Cammie-Really-Personal-Questions-About-Her-Rel ationship" discussion. In other words: fun.

Deflecting the questions of 3 teenage girls seems hard enough, but try deflecting the questions of 3 highly trained operative, who happen to e your best friends and who, you yourself have trained in the art of interrogation. Yes, I felt an inkling of pride which was soon consumed once I heard the first questions.

'No,no, no, no and no! I will tell you what you need to know about my relationships. It's mine, not yours! I don't judge you on your...things or whatever you want to call them.'

'Honeypotting' says Macey.

'Whatever.'

Bex's grin suggests trouble. 'Then I guess we won't tell you what our darling Zachy Poo did over the course of our mission now will we girls?'

'Screw you Bex, I am not telling you anything. Go find another person to blackmail.'

Silence.

Silence.

'Fine. What do you want to know?'

'I knew you'd see sense.' Macey smirks evilly.

'Don't make me regret it. One answer for one answer?'

'Gallagher Girl's honor.'

'Fine.'

Liz pulls out a paper, presumably full of questions meant for my interrogation. She hands it to Macey, who, out of all the girls, is the best at interrogation. It comes in the job description of being a bitch I suppose.

'First: has Zach ever done anything really romantic/cute/adorable that we need to be informed of?'

It's a questioning show down.

3 faces versus 1.

'Yes.'

The gesture for me to go on. 'You didn't say I had to tell you.'

Macey makes a rude gesture.

'If that's the way you're going to play, darling, let the games begin.'

After 2 hours of solid questioning, I've learned 3 things:

1) Macey is a complete... Oh never mind.

2) The entirely of the mission, the girls pestered Zach for information on me. (Bless his heart, he may need some rehab or physiologist sessions after that one.)

3) Zach talks in his sleep- and says my name.

Totally not worth the hell I just went through.

-Though it is really cute.-

NO! You're turning into Macey.

-So? He really likes you!-

You know that already! He's told you.

My mental debate rages on.

The girls relent eventually and pass me a brown envelope, where they claim is all the information I need to know about the mission.

I examine the thickness of the report.

'It's awfully small isn't it?' I ask.

Macey scowls. 'Well you try infiltrating the Circle's top security prisons in one week! It's not easy! Specially without you Cam.'

'Been there, done that.'

She scowls deeply. 'I seem to remember it a different way.'

'Maybe your memory's going down the drain?' I suggest helpfully, then duck as a pillow flies towards my head.

The pillow war the follows... well its a surprise no one came to break it up. Having sound proof walls tends to help with that though.

3 am reaches the clock of Macey's iPhone.

Liz is curled up, asleep on the floor, Bex is yawning tiredly on her sleeping bad, while Macey is passed out flopped on my bed.

I simply survey the damage and wince as I begin to clean up.

Perks of Being and Insomniac:

...

...

...

Yeah there really aren't any.

I fall asleep eventually however, unsure as to the expectations for tomorrow's mission.

But I knew I couldn't fail- Joe's life and mine depended on it.

The paths have been crossed  
The crumbs are gone and the way, and the way is lost  
Melancholy phantoms eye our skins  
Poison apples falling with the wind

Hear the sigh of the trees  
Those who enter here never leave

And the rangers stream out of their cabins  
They are the hunters  
We are the rabbits  
Maybe we don't want to be found  
Maybe we don't want to be found

**Hey Ya'll:**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing (since we all know that as soon as you read this chapter you are going to click the review box and type constructive ****criticsm with your beautiful fingers).**

**I really like the "ask questions and people review and answer them" thingie.**

**So here's the question of this chapter:**

** What is your absolute series of books on the entire face of this planet and beyond? (Please don't say Gallagher Girls- be original.)**

**I will tell you mine:**

** Well I can't choose exactly- but I have top 3:**

** Harry Potter, Divergent, and more (which I bet none of you have read.)**

**Until next time... **

**Enjoy the beginnings of summer and don't forget to review. **


	31. Chapter 31

I sing the National Anthem,  
While I'm standing,  
Over your body,  
Hold you like a python.

National Anthem by Lana del Rey

_I fall asleep eventually however, unsure as to the expectations for tomorrow's mission._

_But I knew I couldn't fail Joe's life and mine depended on it._

The second I closed my eyes, it seemed, a cold waterfall plunged down upon my head.

Bex.

'Up! It's four o'clock in the morning! We're running late!' She yells.

'Thanks for the loving wake-up call, but seriously? A bit vengeful are we now?'

She winks at me. 'Hey, what can I say? Once a bitch, always a bitch.'

'Karma comes around darling.'

She merely laughs.

'Then I'll see you in hell.' she says. Spies always walk a moral tightrope.

'I hate to break up this love fest of sisterhood, but we've got to get you an outfit change. What did you do without me? Forget all your fashion sense?' Macey interrupts, dragging me off to the bathroom, where I shower as she applies her own make up.

'Something like that.' I mutter to myself as the water splashes down my back.

The cloud descends, mercifully short, as time constrains even Macey at times. If there's one thing a spy learns, late is never fashionable, despite Macey's protests.

'Thanks babe.' I say as I sprint out the door of the bathroom, before she decides I need a fresh coat of lip gloss or something.

'What are friends for?' she replies coyly.

'That and killing each other.' I say, offhandedly as I throw my collection of knives into a small duffel bag.

'Too true.' Macey joins me, deciding which of her portable-poison brushes to pack in her suitcase.

My friends have, perhaps, seen a bit to much of my past to forget the truth behind those words. But what's friendship without a little secret?

Or a big secret.

After reassuring Macey we have all our items, we head to the roof as quietly as possible, our practical (and fashionable shoes) allowing us to slid past the doors of sleeping teens with little notice.

Zach's already waiting on the roof, our copter fully fueled and blades eager to take to the sky.

He kisses me good morning, then poops my bags into the helicopter, offering a helping hand as I near the copter.

'Is this part of your "monitoring"?' I whisper in his ear.

'No,' he says, scooping me up in his arms and carrying me into the craft,' this is called being a gentleman.'

I roll my eyes, though secretly I'm pleased.

'I call flying!' Bex shouts eagerly, and races to the cockpit.

'That is such a bad idea.' I tell Zach.

'I heard that missy! You better watch that mouth of yours. Remember who is flying.' Bex yells, as the adjusts the various headsets, buckles and buttons.

'How could I forget when you fly like a maniac? At least let Liz take the co-pilot seat.'

She concedes reluctantly, and Lizzy buckles into her chair.

'Good luck!' I yell to her over the noise of the orators.

She looks as though she will need it.

Macey joins us in the back, sitting across from Zach and I.

She's put on her "mission mask", her serious expression reassured me of many times spent in similar situations. Macey always pulled us through, her planning and organization made it all possible.

'You know I love you, right Mace?'

She doesn't respond, as a jolt sends us all flying sideways.

'Bex!' Macey and I scream in unison.

'Sorry!'

'So where too?' I ask, unused to being to out of the loop in all the planning and scheming. I understand how it feels to be a normal agent now, and boy, I'm glad I'm the Chameleon.

'My private airfield.'

'And then?'

'Circle Prison.'

'Which is where?'

'You know for such a cute girl you sure ask a bunch of questions.'

'Quit playing games! Where is it?'

She looks at me. 'Downtown D.C.'

Lovely.

'Did the C.I.A know about this?' I ask.

She shakes her head gravely. 'They were just as shocked as we were. We can't launch a full out attack on the area because of civilians and unknown sphere of influence, but their watching it now.'

'Any advantages we have?'

'Pedestrian traffic, which could tip in either the advantageous and disadvantageous side. C.I.A backup, which may prove useful, but the mission requires a smaller team. Other than that, the Circle couldn't have picked a worse spot to start a base. Who knows how many agents they've got infiltrating the White House.'

'That bad?'

'Worse.'

'How?'

'You'll see.'

Can it get any better? Sarcasm.

'Mission objective?'

'Simple: regain contact with the Subject and determine possible methods of infiltration.'

'What?! You expect me to "contact" Joe! Not happening! I refuse. I will not leave that base without him- no matter what happens. I don't care about the "Mission Objectives"! The C.I.A can rot in hell for all I care! We are returning the Subject or else I'm not returning. Clear?'

From the cockpit, Bex's voice travels over the sound of the machinery buzzing. 'I'm guessing you told her then?'

Macey yells back, 'Yeah, she's taking it pretty well!'

Turning her attention back to me, she states calmly, 'That's where you come in.'

'Me? But I thought I was supposed to "assist"' I state with a bitter laugh.

Macey grins. 'Yes, that's the excuse. You see, Buckingham couldn't get a write off to allow you full control of the mission, so instead she made you an unoffical asset.'

We both grin. 'And unofficial really means is you can get away with whatever, so long as the C.I.A. can't see it.' we finish in unison.

'You girls are scary sometimes.' Zach says.

'We're Gallagher Girls, that's what we do best.' I say.

The rest of the short flight was passed in silence, as Zach played with my hair and Macey filed her nails.

The plane we transferred to was most Macey's personal jet, and therefore, decorated lavishly with all the latest fashions, and gadgets. At least the seats were comfortable.

I slept gently after take-off. (Macey had insisted on flying, as the jet was her "baby". Unlike Bex, Macey was more rational when it came to flying.) My body still ached from the wounds and the poison, and the more rest I had, the more I could "assist" on the mission.

Zach shook me awake when we landed on the runway of a small, private airfield.

'Macey, will the attendants be reporting this landing? Any trace could give us away.'

She winked, as a short, balding man approached us. Turning to him, Macey said, 'Paul, I expect you remember our arrangement?'

The man looked slightly nervous to be talking the Macey McHenry, but he nodded.

'Very well. Here.' Macey said as she passed him an envelope. I had a suspicion that the Senator's banking account would be slightly lessened after today's events.

'You were saying Cam?'

'You're the best.'

'That's what I thought.'

The limo takes us to the hotel Liz arranged for us. We pull into the drive-way. In my opinion, the limo was a bit flashy (seriously someone's going to be curious!) but Macey uses her media influence to pass it off as a trip to visit her father. We manage to get into the hotel and into our room without major complications.

'Home sweet home.' Macey says, swinging open the door to the room she and I share. Bex and Liz pop their heads in from the adjoining room to the left, while Zach unpacks to the right.

The carpets are luscious, the 2 king sized beds, the most comforting money could by. The adjoining dining room is well furnished, and kitchen stocked with delectable food. The life of a spy has some perks, I suppose. But I feel uncomfortable, as though I'm being watched. I search carefully for bugs, and find a video camera perched beneath the dining room table, and a recording device on my nightstand. After disabling them, I motion for Bex and Liz to do a sweep of their own room, and alert Zach silently to the possibility of intrusion.

'Macey, we can't stay here for long. Sooner or later the person who planted the bugs will notice that their not reporting and come to investigate. 3 rooms in a row? That's awfully suspicious. Couldn't you have chosen multiple directions and floors?'

'Well if I did', Macey retorts, 'then it would have been more suspicious for people to constantly walk into the same room and it would be more obvious.'

I still disagree, but I rest my case, at least for the present moment. There are more important things to worry about.

'So what's the plan?' I ask.

Silence.

'Is there a plan?'

'Well yes. But we're still unsure of the execution.' says Zach.

'So? What is it?' I ask expectantly.

'We're going to need one person infiltrate the building to contact Joe. We have a route, but it's tight and dangerous, and there's little possibly of eventual exit.' he says.

'Just my kind of job. Where is it?'

Zach looks at Macey for support.

'It's underneath the Capitol building.' she says.

'That's not so bad! I could pose as a Senator, and you could come using your Dad, Congress is in-session right now, so the activity will hardly be noticed, there are so many press reporters surrounding the building.'

'It's not really that simple.'

'Booby traps? Mazes? What?'

'The Circle has issued an ultimatum. We just found it, a week ago. Macey used her connection with her dad to get down into the basement, to spy on the door. They informed us that if there was any breach of security, they would blow up the entire Capitol building, no matter who was in the building.' Zach says, looking at me.

'And the C.I.A. just stood there and took this? God! They're letting an international terrorist organization reside under the home of America's lawmakers?'

Bex rolls her eyes. 'We tried to explain the severity, but Americans can be so stubborn sometimes.'

'More like all the time.' I say. She laughs.

'So, basically, we either get in flawlessly, or the entire House of Representatives and Senate are killed?'

'Basically.'

'Fun.'

I sing the National Anthem,  
While I'm standing,  
Over your body,  
Hold you like a python.

So this did not go the way I though it would. I think I surprised myself. Was anyone else surprised? Sorry for people who don't live in America if I confused you or anything with American government talk. PM me with questions.

Thanks for all the reviews and fav/follows. It means a lot!

I just want to be done with this story, its gone on way too long. Hope you all aren't tired of it yet!

Question:

Do you like to travel over the summer? Do you go to camps and stuff?

I do. I'm going to adventure camp with 3 of my friends for a couple weeks. So excited.

Have a lovely day!


	32. Chapter 32

I'm big enough and bad enough  
And I can tell when things get rough  
Now nothing that you say can break my fall

_Break My Fall by Lana Del Rey (Lizzy Grant)_

_'So, basically, we either get in flawlessly, or the entire House of Representatives and Senate are killed?'_

_'Basically.'_

_'Fun.'_

The tension in the room hung like a thick woolen curtain, dampening all our spirits. The stillness was oppressive, chilling, full of depression. I wanted to reach out and wipe away the pain written on my friend's faces, but the same desperation was mirrored on my own features.

We sank around the dinning room table, accepting the support from its sturdy legs.

How do you go on when you know the outcome?

'What are we going to do?' Zach asks.

Macey: 'We're screwed.'

Bex: 'We can't possible do it.'

Liz: 'Can't the C.I.A. help?'

Each of their words seem to cut me to the heart, each sentence pronounced like a death blow to my heart. All around me, heads hit the table, faces crumpled and defeated sighs released.

It was too much to bear.

'No.'

They turn to look at me.

'No,' I repeat louder this time. 'We can do it. We will do it.' I leave my chair and take to pacing round and round the room.

'You see, this is all part of the Circle's plan. They want us to sense the impossible. That's what they live off of. The fear inspired in others helps them retain their power. The fear is their greatest weapon. We won't be scared. We're the greatest team of spies the C.I.A. has, come on guys! Don't you remember? All those times we spent working, training, striving for this? This is our moment! This is where we shine.' I take a breath and look at their faces.

Macey looks marginally cheered, and Bex is nodding slowly while Liz timidly raises her eyes to my face.

'You guys have been through everything with me, not just missions. I mean everything. We've gone from hell and back, and I'd do it all again, never to change it. Because you all have gone above and beyond for me, that's just we do. We never give in, and we never give up. So what if it's impossible? Who else is better to attempt than the Chameleon and her Crew? We haven't failed a mission yet and I don't intend to break that record now. But I promise, if you just trust me, I know we can do it. I would do anything for you girls, and...' I didn't realize the tear tracing my face until it splashed down onto my shirt.

'I understand if you're reluctant. I get it. But I'm going, and I'd go for you and you know it. So who's in?'

Bex stands. 'I've got you covered sister.'

Macey joins, 'I have a sudden urge to kick some serious Circle ass'

Liz wraps her arms around me, and I know she's with me till the end.

My eyes lock with Zach's from across the room. He nods with silent pride filling his eyes.

Macey breaks the moment, in her characteristically brunt way, 'Now that this lovey dovey shit is over, can we start planning, before our assses get blown off the map?'

Liz looks a little affronted at the strength behind the words.

'I had an idea.' I say.

'Go on.'

'Where exactly did you say "covert" way into the prison was?'

'East wing, below the staircase to the right, there's a small hole, less than 2 feet wide.' Zach says. 'No one knows where it goes, or how far it is down, and it looks to be created by erosion over time. I think,' he scrutinizes Liz and I, ' that only Liz or Cammie could fit inside, even then, it would be a tight squeeze, and we're unsure as to the exact size and route the it leads too. But I am positive the Circle is unaware of its existence. I only found it by stepping inside.'

'Okay. And the "main entrance"? How guarded is that?' I ask. It is rather inconvenient, my lack of knowledge on the situation.

'Traps and guards. Mainly impassable.'

A horrible plan was worming its way into my brain.

'Is there any way to expand the secret entrance?'

'Not sure,' says Zach. 'We could try, but it would just attract undue attention, possibly getting us caught.'

The plan has seized upon my mind, utterly captivating my mental facilities. The girls will never let me do it, and Zach, I think I'd have to tie him to a post simply to be allowed out of his sight.

If it was going to work, then I'd better get scheming.

Silence once again filled the room, and I sat down, my mind wrapped in thoughts of equipment, tools, methods of escape... when

'Cam? You're being pensively quiet.'

'Just thinking, you know, using the noodle for some good.'

My eyes flick to Zach, and he senses my thoughts. Thank God for perceptive spy boyfriends.

'What if we came back to this tomorrow? It's late and Cam might need some time to think it over before she releases her genius plan.'

The girls nod assent and head off to bed with murmured 'G'night's' to Zach and I.

'Thanks for saving me back there.' I whisper as I lean up to peck his check with a light kiss.

'Are you going to inform me of you genius plan? I know you've got it mostly figured, you just don't know something, a tiny factor that has a huge impact.'

I stare at him. 'Are you for reals? How did you know?'

He smirks. 'It's the way I think. I know the look.'

'Well you're right.'

'So what is it?'

'What's what?'

'Are you going to play this with me Cam?'

'Fine. I can't tell you.'

'Why?'

'Because, I know you'll never agree. It's easier this way.'

'Don't do it. Whatever it is, I know it's a bad idea.'

'Yeah well it's the only idea we've got, unless you can pull out a brilliant scheme in less than 12 hours.'

He looks at me mournfully.

That night, my mind is churning, over and over the plan spins though my head, I analyze the outcomes, possible alternative, and other methods. Nothing else seems to fit.

It's like a clear path has been illuminated in my mind, outshining all other possibilities. It's risky, it's dangerous. It's right.

I don't know what to do.

The only option has been pushed towards the back of my mind, when it surfaces, I constantly shuffle it to the back. But it's constant reappearances only enhances the truth I know.

I have to lie to my friends.

In the spy world, friendships are rare, relationships rarer, and marriage like an unseen species. Most spies wouldn't hesitate to lie to anyone. But not me. I've told my friends everything, down to the tiny details. I haven't lied to them since our first meeting over 7 years ago, and I've done some horrible things. But I always told them the truth.

Could I really give that up?

Reason tells me I must, or else we'll never succeed.

My heart says it's not worth the grief.

Reason eventually wins out.

When the light finally appears the next morning after a sleepless night, I wake and prepare morning tea for my crew. I've turned my mind into mission mode, where relations are degraded to acknowledged comrades.

Once all members are settled around the table, the scene reminds me strangely of last night's scene, and I pass around steaming mugs to fill the silence.

'So,' I say. 'I have an idea.'

They turn, expecting the Cammie the Chameleon to swoop in and save the day.

At the sight of their hopeful faces, I nearly loose my nerve. My hands clench and my mind wavers. "Snap out of it. You must do this!" The sight of their loving faces gives me the strength to open my mouth. I will not let my loved ones die again. I've lost enough already.

The words begin to flow. I fill them in on The Plan. The Plan which will keep them safe from harm, and keep the fire off of the Capitol. I'm counting on my own speed to keep this mission afloat, because if their plan was actually to be implemented, surely one of them would get hurt. All the while I mention my own role as support and backup sensible and proper within mission perimeters.

Inside my head, the truth is caged behind iron bars, and I shudder inwardly as they soak up my every lie, preparing for a mission they will never enact.

Because, the truth is, it's going to be a one-woman job.

I'm big enough and bad enough  
And I can tell when things get rough  
Now nothing that you say can break my fall

**I have a confessions to make...**

**I'm actually Ally Carter in ****disguise- and I publish my ideas for the next book on here to see how well recepted they will be. Hahahahaha LIES! **

**No I was just kidding. There is no way I am Ally Carter- first of all, I am not a professional writer (you guys have obviously read my story enough to know that) and second- I am a 14 year old girl who really wishes she had as much money as Ally Carter. **

**Ok, Ok, let me explain why I decided to rudely to lie to ya'll.**

**I swear I am physic. Why? Ok so the new title and cover for GG6 was ****released earlier this month and it is called "United We Spy". I, however, didn't know about this until today when I read somebody's chapter. **

**BUT THE NEXT BOOK IS GOING TO BE ABOUT CAMMIE'S EXPERIENCES WHILE TAKING DOWN THE COC AND IT RELATES SOMEHOW TO THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT AND SAVING AMERICA WHICH IS BASICALLY WHAT THE CLIMAX OF MY STORY IS ABOUT. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT! ALLY CARTER TRANSMITTED SOME OF HER GENUIS INTO MY BRAIN AND PRODUCED THE ENDING TO UNDONE! ITS AWESOME!**

**I am so in tune with the workings of her mind- its legitly surreal. **

**Sorry for the above creepy-girl ness.**

**Bringing back normal persona now...**

**Ok so how's everyone?**

**Question:**

**Should I write another story after this, and what should it be about?**


	33. Chapter 33

_Because, the truth is, it's going to be a one-woman job._

I awake the next morning, feeling my mortality sliding slowly away like the shell of my childhood. The feeling awakes me to the reality stretching along the horizon of my life, the short, brief flash of color, before the endless night.

I barely hear the morning conversations, the hot coffee barely registers in my throat as I swallow it down.

Preparations already made, the drive to the Capitol slides by smoothly, the well oiled machine that was this mission. If only they knew.

They exit the car, leaving my still sitting, unwilling to move from my seat. My eyes soak their appearances up like a sponge, like a child trying to catch a butterfly.

Soon the memories will have faded, leaving me in darkness. The dark, I'm scared of the dark I think, praying to the Gods, and hoping it will never come. But knowing the inevitable sleep will appear. Hope has never seen so dangerous.

My movements are seem slow, though at their normal pace. The world seems to have stopped spinning on, while nearby the oblivious faces of 4 strangers treat me as a friend with their looks.

3 girls dispatch themselves, as though well-aware of their duty. Their steps, so assured, so uniform, so different from my own feet which wobble and falter as I quietly walk behind the Capitol Building.

The steps are killing me, as surely as a bullet through the heart. Beside me, Zach's warmth radiates towards me, so alien to my own ice cold hands.

_In my mind I see the coffin, wooden and firm, thudding to the bottom of the grave. So dark, as the rain pours down from the sky, and washes away the tears with nature's gift. The wind howls, as it pays it's own tribute to my ended story. _

'Here we are.' His voice, coming so close to my right awaken me from my dreary trance. Words seem foreign to me, like sounds I can't understand. An infant, staring into the faces above me, hearing noise but firmly entranced in my own thoughts.

The soft dirt lays undisturbed, unbroken by human contact.

I stare apprehensively at the spot indicated, like a clean slate ready to be re-worked. The shovel flicks up mounds of brown life into a pile by my feet. I stand as a silent statue, watching my future being unearthed. The small hole engulfs my slender waist, as I sink into the earth, held to life only by the thinnest of ropes connected to my harness.

The goodbye kiss reminds me of sweetness, of love, of life. His lips taste of strawberry's.

The earth swallows me in its belly, removing all traces of life from above the earth.

I can't give in now. No, the time for acceptance is near, but not yet present. To make my sacrifice meaningful, Joe must escape safely and Zach and the others must be protected.

I force myself to abandon my destructive thoughts for the moment of truth and focus my attention of the walls of the passage I am suddenly contained in.

The claustrophobia sets in immediately, but I fight through, another secret never shared. Hand before hand, knee after knee, I quietly make my way towards the warmer air of the east. The dirt is soft and moist, sticking to my hands and coating me in nature. Onward, to the unknown. Soon, the tunnel widens nearly imperceptibly, but the sign alerts me to the proximity of the Goal.

The shift to concrete is no surprise, and I move forward, memorizing the turns taken, in case one must go back alone.

The first air shaft I encounter leads to an interrogation room- coated in red, but empty of Joe.

The next leads to a kitchen, where gloomy and chained men and women partake of the only substance that ties them to the world.

Again and again rooms empty of Joe's presence.

The 13th attempt reveals Joseph Soleman, alive and alert, as he perches him self on the cot occupying the room.

Dropping to the floor, he doesn't even to bother to talk, though his eyes swim with a river of unanswered questions. My eyes promise answers I know will never be given. I beckon for him to follow me, hoping the shaking of my hand goes unnoticed. I cut a hole in the door, the laser I used reminds me painfully of Liz and her attempts to develop it. Liz, her blonde hair, clumsy nature, accent. It rushes in my momentary breach and nearly drowns me in waves of sadness.

Slowly, we creep out, walking the plank to our doom- or mostly mine. The cells lining the hallway we pass through contain the lives of agents who sacrificed themselves for their cause. The locked doors give me courage to move on, to continue, knowing the same doors would still be locked when they lowered my body to the grave. Somehow, I felt the eyes behind the doors boring into my back, warning me of the path.

My cause is love.

I pass Joe a note, written on Evapo-paper, explaining his escape. His nod confirms that one piece of the puzzle is secure: 999 left to go.

He doesn't know where to go any more than I do, but it's so quiet, so empty I can't bear to walk any longer. The silence taunts me with its mocking implications.

Panic is building, building tall within my heart. Then the footsteps start.

When they drag me into the room, I don't put up a fight, resigned as I was. My goal now was to get Joe away alive.

The echo of boots on the silent stone floor turns up my head to stare at the brillant red head pacing in front of my stooped figure.

'You thought I was dead.' It is no question. The chill in her voice drives deep to my heart, eliminating the small shred of hope which had flickered for but a moment.

Response at this point, is impossible.

Above me, I imaging Macey, Liz and Bex starting to enact Part A. The clock ticking in their minds marks the end of my time.

She kicks my face, leaving a gash in my forehead, letting the blood drip into my eyes. The red splashes to the ground.

'Never, ever underestimate me.'

My eyes are swimming in pools of blood, but I can hear her laugh of disgust through my undamaged ears.

'What do you want?' The blood flies from my mouth, where it had pooled from my forehead. It puddles, and spread over the cold concrete floor.

'It's always been you darling, that I've wanted. This one here,' she kicks Joe's stomach, who can do nothing but watch as his arms are pinned by 2 goons. 'He was never the object, simply a mean to an end I suppose you may say. He was supposed to be you, but he was too noble to allow you to be captured. But you, Cammie, have always fascinated me. I suppose it will be a pity, to see you dead, though I can promise I will relish the feeling of the trigger being pulled. Your death, the last of the Morgans to be destroyed, symbolizes the true victory of the Circle.'

'You don't want to do that yet.' My nerve is steel.

'And why not?' She smiles at me, as though I'm a child. Her laugh fills my muscles with fire, and I long to strangle her. My hands clench.

'Because of what's hidden in my left pocket.'

The flashing red button counts the minutes to her doom. Our doom. The country's doom.

'How do I know you're not bluffing?'

'Room 4B, left corner, the black box. That's your bomb, scheduled to blow in less than 5 minutes. I guarantee you will not be able to move or disable within the time. And you can't crack the detonator, only I can disable it.'

'Then we'll all go down.'

'I'll make you a deal. You take Joe away from here, you get him out while I disable the bomb, and you can have what you want. You can have me, but Joe gets out safely, or we all go up.'

I can't look Joe in the eye.

Catherine doesn't hesitate. 'Get him out of here. Now!'

He is dragged out the door, the tears streaming down his face mirrored on my own checks.

Catherine drags me to the bomb, fingers gripping my arm with a malicious clamplike hand. 'Do it. Or else he dies with us.' And it's all she needs to say before the flashing lights go out for good.

'All clear.' I report.

'All clear.' The comms unit reports to Catherine, as she nods.

'Now, I believe we have a visitor to greet.'

And when I see Zach's face, guarded between to men, my heart stops beating. No, no, no, not now.

'Hello son.' Catherine smiles with teeth that remind me more of canines.

'Catherine.' He spits out.

'You're just in time to witness a little show I have planned.'

No, no, no. Anytime but now.

'You're going to watch.'

The gun is in her hand now, and I watch the blood red finger pull back, closer and closer to the end.

The sound has gone from the world again. I look over and see Zach, screaming, fighting, kicking. His mouth opens, and lips move. My ears are filled with the crack of the gun, the whirl of motion. I look into his eyes, and feel the bullet enter my chest, and puncture my side. His eyes, so green, so beautiful...

I'd never wanted to die. It never fit in my plan, up until my last mission. The appeal of an ended life had never touched the gulf of my mind, not even in my darkest moments.

Why then, did I walk down this path? Why did I force my feet to move, and my heart to beat, when a simple word would have saved my life?

Looking back, I realized the moment was caught up in a wave of love, a wave of feeling I'd never planned on. The first rule of my life had seemingly been erased, and I found myself free to let interference cloud my judgement.

I'd like to think at one point I was a good spy, a spy who followed the rules. A spy intent on survival. And perhaps I was. At some point in my life, I had decided to reject survival to instead embrace danger. The love that replaced it, unconscious for a time, was my downfall. My sweet, loving destruction.

I couldn't tell you when, or where it happened. But perhaps the change wasn't so much a choice but a necessity.

Exchanging one survival for another. I couldn't tell you why.

The faded memories haunt me in the limbo embracing my soul. I remember the moments of death, and the people for whom it was for.

I hope they find the letter, the letter explaining everything.

_Dear Bex, Macey, Liz, Zach and Joe,_

_ I've moved on. I've gone onto places I've never before seen. I've always loved you, and for you this sacrifice was made. There is no guilt placed upon you- the actions were entirely of my own doing. Your faces will be forever in my mind, the sounds of your voices will forever ring in my ears until I alight to the chambers of angels. The memories we've shared will live on with you, in the actions and __accomplishments still in your future. Do not think about my future- the world is still available to you. Know this, my place will always be in your heart, though dirt and time separate our paths. I've never loved until you, and for love I've lived a thousand lives to replace the one I've given. My path has been wandering, actions complex and often methodical. But my legacy is now yours to carry. Carry it with honor, with all the pride I've earned in this life. Never forget my love for you, and never regret the time we've spent. The rest of your lives need not end with mine. _

_ Love, Cammie._

The last whisper of my thoughts were with them, as the bullet stopped my heart, it didn't stop my love. And now I'm here, and moving own, never to forget, but forever to live.

**Don't kill me please.**

**Instead review!**

**Who wants an ****epilogue? If so, I will post one if I get to 155 reviews! (Come on, just express your anger at the ending of the story!) **

**Please?**

**I'm sorry if I ruined the ending. But life ain't sunshine and rainbows, at least not for most people so I just wanted to be unique, since most FFictions end happily and stuff. Well not all but I hope you will accept this.**

**Review.**


	34. Chapter 34

**Ok guys, here is the ending to the sad story. Yes, I really am sorry for the ending. I am a horrible person and I really do feel bad for ruining some of your dreams. But I had to end the story and it felt right.**

**What follows are letters that the gang wrote and put on Cammie's grave. I think this will be the last post, but if you want more, review and if I get to 165 reviews I will write more. So review away.**

**Thanks for all the review I did get, even if some were angry at me :0 I figured that would happen. Thanks for being amazing readers for the whole entire long adventure which was Undone. Oh its so sad to see it go by. **

******"Dark Paradise"**

******by Lana Del Rey**

All my friends tell me I should move on  
I'm lying in the ocean, singing your song  
Ahhh, that's how you sang it  
Loving you forever, can't be wrong  
Even though you're not here, won't move on  
Ahhh, that's how we played it

And there's no remedy for memory your face is  
Like a melody, it won't leave my head  
Your soul is haunting me and telling me  
That everything is fine  
But I wish I was dead

Every time I close my eyes  
It's like a dark paradise  
No one compares to you  
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side  
Every time I close my eyes  
It's like a dark paradise  
No one compares to you  
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side

All my friends ask me why I stay strong  
Tell 'em when you find true love it lives on  
Ahhh, that's why I stay here

And there's no remedy for memory your face is  
Like a melody, it won't leave my head  
Your soul is haunting me and telling me  
That everything is fine  
But I wish I was dead

Every time I close my eyes  
It's like a dark paradise  
No one compares to you  
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side  
Every time I close my eyes  
It's like a dark paradise  
No one compares to you

But there's no you, except in my dreams tonight,  
Oh oh oh, ha ha ha  
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight  
Oh oh oh oh, ha ha ha ha  
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight

There's no relief, I see you in my sleep  
And everybody's rushing me, but I can feel you touching me  
There's no release, I feel you in my dreams  
Telling me I'm fine

Every time I close my eyes  
It's like a dark paradise  
No one compares to you  
I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side  
Every time I close my eyes  
It's like a dark paradise  
No one compares to you

But there's no you, except in my dreams tonight,  
Oh oh oh oh, ha ha ha ha  
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight  
Oh oh oh oh, ha ha ha ha  
I don't wanna wake up from this tonight

**After Cammie's death, Joe was safely returned, the Capitol saved, Zach released, and the mission labeled "success" by the CIA. But to her friends, the world seemed to be over, empty, lonely. **

**Each year, the group would meet and place letters in a box beside Cammie's grave, marking each passing year in remembrance of their friend's life. **

**The day of the Funeral**

_Zach's Letter_

Dear Gallagher Girl,

You were always so tiny, but I never truly realized until I carried your body from the Circle's prison. You were in my arms how I always wanted, but there was no joy, no laughter. You were gone. The blood spilled until it coated my arms, and your face paled, eyes still open. You were still beautiful, even dipped in red.

I would've died with you, I would have followed you to the grave. I think it would have been easier that way. I still have my shirt, coated in red, reminding me of your sacrifice. I can't seem to throw it out, it stands as a symbol of my failure.

The bullet hit you chest, and I felt my own heart stop. Catherine, she just stared at my, screaming and crying as I watched you slump to the side with no strength left. In my mind I knew you would never rise, but my heart imagined you alive. Catherine looked at me, and laughed. I begged for her to end my life, to end my suffering, to put me from my misery. She laughed, and said "What would be the fun in that?". She forced me to carry you to the surface. The other Circle members lined the walls to watch me pass, you dead in my arms. They laughed, and spat.

I think the worst part wasn't my own loss, but the loss of all the others. Bex, Liz and Macey had already evacuated the Capitol building, and your trail of blood dripped onto the fine carpets of the Senate's chambers as I emerged.

I failed you.

At first I don't think they realized who you were. It was Bex first, she had known you the longest. I never expected Baxter to be capable of tears. The tears flowed that night, and the next day, and the next day, until I lost track of the tissue boxes.

Joe, I think, was in shock. He just stood there, talking to himself.

Gallagher Girl, take me with you. I don't think I can go on any more. The world is so cold, and bleak. I feel nothing, I feel like a hollow shell of a man. Now all I remember are the words I never said, the times we never had.

Mostly, the words I love you flash through my head. Because I never told you the truth.

I love you. I love you.

Zach.

_Bex's Letter_

Dear Cam,

Cammie, why'd you go? Don't you know I needed you? You were the strong one, the one to keep my together when I'd broken. I still remember the countless nights I into you shoulder, and you were so warm and steady in my arms.

Now you cold and dead. When Zach brought up your body, I knew it was you. Your blonde hair spilled from you head and cascaded down, coated in red. You arms were relaxed, and hung listlessly in his shaking arms as he cried. The blood was too much, too real for it to be anything else.

I think, for a moment, I lost myself in the depths of sorrow. I don't remember what happened next, but I found myself holding you, squeezing you until the heat had faded from your limbs. Zach had to pull me off of your body when they took you away, and the bruises on his face will last for many days. But he seemed to relish the pain, anything to distract him from the inside.

Your shoulder still shows the remnants of my tears, so many it matched the blood spilled from your chest. It was so real, so tender, the love we had.

My sister, in all but blood. Now you have no blood, making our bond stronger still.

Cam, you didn't have to go. I would have gone for you, in your stead. The bullet should have been mine. It should have been mine.

I don't know if I can take it much longer.

Bex.

_Liz's Letter_

Dear Cammie,

You're gone. I know I must be dreaming, I know it's not possible for Cameron Morgan to be 6 feet under a pile of dirt. Because the odds just don't allow it.

I miss you. I miss you more than physically possible. You can't be gone. I still can't accept it as I sit and write this letter to you. I hope you're happy, wherever you are now.

I hope all the joy you gave us finds you in the afterlife. You deserve it, you deserve so much more than you got here on Earth. You needed more than you were given.

I never felt worthy to be your friend, and now the weight of your friendship presses down even harder. You never left me out, you never left me behind. You love me, and I couldn't help but live you as my sister.

The work I've done seems like nothing, like papers so be burned. I think a part of me was killed, a part of me that will never come back.

I've always been so sure, so confident in my facts and figures.

I don't know what to do any more.

Liz.

_Macey's Letter_

Dear Cameron Ann Morgan.

You left me. You left me alone in this could desolate hell of an Earth. Don't you know I loved you? Wasn't it enough for you to stay to help your friends? To help me? Did I not show you love? Was there a reason for your desire to escape life? Were we not good enough for you to stay in life?

Oh Cam, I'm so sorry. I'm so lost without you. You were the one who changed me for good. I was beyond hope when you took me in, when you straightened me out. You took a lost girl and showed her the path.

I owe you, I owe you such an unnumerall debt. I'll never repay you.

Can you forgive me Cam? Can you forgive me of all my wrongs? Of my mistakes? I've been so selfish, so closed. You saw the good in my heart, so deeply buried I never saw it myself.

I was so strong on the outside, but you were the one who kept me up on the inside. I think my heart has collapsed. I don't know how to re-build it. I think it was shattered, a million tiny pieces that will never return to me. Their all buried with you, in a tiny box, in the cold ground.

I need you Cam. I never told you this, and its too late now. But I needed you. I need you now.

I don't know who to lean on anymore.

Macey

_Joe's Letter_

Dear Camster,

I remember the first time I held you. Matthew placed you in my arms, and I held you so tightly. You were like my own daughter, the one I could never keep.

When I saw you in his arms, I remembered the first time I held you again. I know I've failed you, I've fail Matt.

How could you leave?

I miss you Cammie. You were so bight, so perfect.

You left for me. The guilt is too much for me. I can't write the feeling of despair sinking to my heart, and I won't try.

I'm broken.

I don't know how to live with myself anymore.

Joe.

**5 years Later**

_Zach's Letter_

Gallagher Girl,

I'm going crazy. You would have been 21 today, your birthday. The future haunts me still, as it will forever.

I bought a ring today. I bought a ring and left it at your grave. I imagined you standing at the alter in white. Where I would have stood across from you, and watched that smile capture my heart again and again. I've tried to move on, believe me. But that ring still stands as the token of my love for you. It's buried along side you.

I'm still tied to your grave. I sit by your head stone and remember.

I want to move on, but I just can't. I know you want me go move forward, but I just can't. Sure, I put up a good front. Only Bex suspects, she's the one who sees me the most.

I'm not really living. I breathe, I eat, I sleep, I walk. I don't live. I know I died along with you.

My nightmares replay that day over and over. I see the ruby cascading from you, and the life draining. I wake and my tears coat my body like your blood did. Every day. Every night, I see you again and again. My dreams are the only time I see your face. The bitter pain of the memory is almost worth the sight of your face looking at me. The eyes.

I've given up fighting the pain. Instead I let it consume me.

Gallagher Girl, I still love you.

Zach

_Bex's Letter_

There's a ring on my finger now. It's silver, and diamond, and ties me to Grant, the man I love. Our wedding is in a few months. We have a place card just for you. A special seat where the maid of honor would have sat, a place where I know you'll be. I don't think I'll be having a maid of honor. Anyone else would just betray our bond.

Remember when we promised to be at each other's weddings, no matter what?

Oh Cam, the hole in my heart is still here. They told me it would fade in time, they said I'd get over it. But its widedened through the years. I think about you every day, how you would have laughed at Grant's stupidity, how we would have trained together every day, how we could have taught at Gallagher together.

Together.

I've given up the life of a spy.

I've graduated college, with a degree in cooking. I've given up my agressive ways, and now I cook, and cook.

I can't face the misisons without you anymore. The crew was never anything without their Chameleon.

I won't get over you. I can't get over you.

Bex

_Liz's Letter_

Cammie,

I've grown out of my shell, just as you always wanted me to all those years ago. It's because of you. Now, I'm a public speaker, and I lecture about codes and science and all the things that couldn't save your life.

It's because of you, all my courage. It isn't real courage though. Not the courage you always had. It's not the kind of courage to take a bullet for your friends, but it's the best I've got. Each time I step on stage, I see you in the audience, watching me how I know you would if you were still here. It's just enough to keep the words coming from my mouth. You inspire me each day. I remember you so well, like it was just yesterday.

You were always so much smarter than me, so much better, so perfect and graceful in ways I could never achieve through my sciences. But you loved me, someone so small and tiny and awkard as I. I never told you how it surprised me, our first day at Gallagher in the 7th grade when you picked out the smallest, tiniest and lonliest girl to sit by. You taught me how to fake it until you make it. You taught me so much more than all my books. Your life was the best example anyone could hope to find.

I'm dating a boy, he's just like me. Oh Cammie, you would love to meet Jonas. He says he feels like he's already meet you, since I talk about you so much. He holds me when I cry from the memories.

I miss you. I miss all the memories. My brain holds on tighter and tighter through the years, always thinking about you.

Thank you Cammie, for all you've done.

Liz

_Macey's Letter_

Cam

If you can read this through the tears, I hope you will smile up in heaven. Time has flown by, but I write you letters every week, though I have no where to send them. I'm living in Paris now, in a luxurious apartment, with millions of dollars and everything given to me in the lap of luxury.

I hate it.

I remember how once, on a mission in Brazil you saw a starving kid in the street and gave him money and bread, then smiled as he ran off to share with his family.

I've done the same. I've adopted 2 little girls, sisters I found on the streets in Paris. They have blonde hair and blue eyes and remind me so much of you I cry each night when I tuck them into bed. They're my new life now, they keep me going when I have nothing to live for. When you have everything, it's then you realize how little you really need.

You had nothing, really. No family, no parents, painful past. But you made a new life, a new family for all of us. One day, I hope I can be as good as you, as loving as you were. You taught me the meaning of family and the meaning of sacrifice.

I've dated, but no one is quite right for me. I know you would ask me each night when I get home for all the details, and laugh and cry with me at every heartbreak. I miss you most on those nights.

Cam, you've no idea how much influence you have, no idea how we've all died inside.

We're moving on, but still find ourselves in the same spot as 5 years ago: your grave. I know you so much better than I ever did before.

You're the best Cam, even from beyond the grave.

Macey.

_Joe's Letter_

Cammie,

I won't write much because I know I'll see you soon.

I have cancer.

But its nothing to the pain I feel ever day thinking of you. I can't wait to join you in the afterlife, to find the same peace I know you're enjoying.

I love you.

Joe.


	35. Chapter 35

**After much eternal debate, I have decided to write a new story. Here is the first 1/2 of the chapter. It is really AU and will not follow many characters (besides Zach and Cammie.) I hope you guys will read and review to tell me a ya or nay for continuing with the publication and upkeep of this new story. **

**Also, who wants to help me think of a summary for it? Hope you like it and decide to review.**

**Lastly, thank you so much for all of the support you have given to "Undone" these past months. It's been fun sometimes, ****and annoying other times to have to update but you guys bore with me for the whole thing. I love you all :) **

**And my final apology: Sorry for those who hated the ending. I totally relate. If any of you have read the Inheritance Cycle- and read the last book, I nearly killed Christopher Paolini after it. So I totally respect you if you decide to hate me for all eternity. It's cool.  
**

**Enjoy.**

Chapter 1: "The Waiting Game"

Gold hair spilled onto a forest green dress, ringlets contrasting lightly with the shockingly deep color. She stepped from her carriage with a tiny-gloved hand lightly resting on the outstretched arms of the footman. As soon as her feet touched the gravel, eyes follow her dainty steps. The click-clack of her silver shoes echoed on the marbled floor of yet another Palace, to yet another ballroom. The silent servants watched her with guarded expressions.

Gold encased doors met her arrival to the scene. The announcement of her presence was met with the respectful silence of high society, then the hasty attempts to re-engage in conversation. The ballroom was swathed in velvet and satin, the swirling skirts and flashing gold of the elite competing for attention. The music engulfed the room's chatter, weaving its graceful way into the surrounding night. The ladies batted eyes, the gentlemen swooped down upon their unsuspecting prey. It was the scene fit for royalty, fit for her position.

The swooping cut of the dress's back showed off pale skin and defined muscles of a Huntress, but the gathered crowd saw only the demure posture she was forced to adopt for formal occasions.

The neckline danced on the edge of fashion; showcasing a drooping necklace of diamonds caressing the slender neck of the Princess.

The dancing steps traced around the ballroom, as she was traded, partner-to-partner. Never a moment for rest, always expected to fulfill her duty to company rather than to her aching feet. The eligible bachelors of the surrounding kingdoms all vied for her attentions, and were met with a mask of flirtations that kept them satisfied until they moved on to the next pretty face.

As her last partner relinquished his grip and moved across the room to flirt with the Lady hailing from West Umbrage, she turned and attempted to make her way, unnoticed to the wall to recline in peace with the dowagers sitting on chaise lounge chairs.

A tap on her shoulder interrupted her plans for escape.

"May I have this dance?" said a prince from a far off country. Bulgaria perhaps. Or was it Turkey? His dark looks gave no suggestion as to his exact origin.

"Of course." She placed her gloved hand lightly into his proffered fingers, suppressing longing thoughts of an empty seat.

His large hand at her waist rested comfortably as he guided her skillfully around the other couples occupying the dance floor.

"May I ask your name?" he questioned politely. She suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. As if he didn't know. Her family's reputation had proceeded her, if the whispers meant anything.

"Cameron, Princess of Britain."

"A pleasure. I'm Zachary, Prince of Spain."

So she had been correct in her assumption.

"An honor, Sir."

The final cadence signaled release for Cameron, and she forced a smile as she swopped into a graceful curtsey and allowed the Prince to kiss her hand.

"Until next time." He said, sweeping her a bow, then melted into the crowd of dashing suits and pastry colored skirts.

And again the cloud of gentlemen descended upon her, once she was spotted without a partner.

The night proceeded in the same fashion as all the others. Shamefully obvious flattery, honey-dipped compliments all forced her way, until the air was thick with the smothering perfumes and fake smiles of the social climbers.

She bore it all for nearly 4 hours until the stuffy ballroom was just too much. The moonlight night called her to its side, as the smell of roses drifted in through an open balcony. Escape was so near. The light breeze ruffled her hair as she exited the ballroom for the peace of the solitary platform. The sounds of the party drifted to her, across the ocean of her thoughts. Her absence would be noted all too soon.

It had become a game for her, really. A waiting game, of counting the seconds of freedom before duty called her back.

The night touched her skin, and seemed to envelop the small teen into darkness. It was so peaceful, so right, out in the dark alone.

"Your Highness."

The voice called her back to herself, and reluctantly she turned to again retained her position on the dance floor. Her favorite lady-in-waiting and only confidant stood behind her, with a melancholy smile as she watched her mistress enjoying the scant freedom the wind provided. But it was her duty.

"Yes, thank you Kat."

She turned and headed back into the crowded room.

Trading smiles, laughing at pointless humor and fluttering her fan in the well-bred manner engrained into her habits by years of training.

It was the act of a flawless machine of society. The act never slipped, never once betrayed a flicker of emotion boiling beneath the surface. Only her eyes, sharp and blue, showed the true flashes of emotion in the flickering candlelight.

The final strands of music faded into the night as she finally re-entered her carriage. The pretentious mask dropped immediately from her face as she kicked off her shoes and pulled off her gloves with a vindictive expression. The golden ringlets spilled down her bare back as she practically yanked the clips from her scalp. The green dress was hoisted above her knees as she lounged on the soft carriage bench. Relief was evident in her expression as she turned to Kat, the only other person present to witness such a breach in decorum.

"I thought it would never end." She said, sitting opposite her closest friend in the darkness of the night.

"Indeed, my lady, I noticed." A sly smile flitted onto the other girls face, gauging the mood of the Princess.

"How many times do I have to tell you Katarina? It's Cameron, or Cam. None of this 'Your Highness' or 'My Lady' unless present company absolutely demands it."

"If it's all the same, I'd prefer Kat."

"As long as we understand each other." She smiled; glad to have one friend in a world of fakes.

The swaying of the carriage lulled Cameron into a deep stupor and the rest of the journey back to her castle passed in comfortable silence. The scenery changed gradually over time, shifting from open country to forested hills and eventually sloping into rocky mountains covered in a mass of green trees. The light of the full moon was blocked by the sable canopy overhead, barely illuminating the winding path to Cameron's castle.

As the wheels slowed, the Princess flung open her own door and descended with bare feet onto the soft grass of her palace home. The servants here at her home knew better than to patronize their Princess. She had made it very clear she was capable of opening her own doors.

Despite the lateness of the hour, a candle still flickered within the windows of Thornfield Palace.

"Cameron dear how was the ball?" An elderly woman emerged, carrying a candlestick and wearing a thick nightdress to keep out the chill of the evening. Her knowing smile was directed at the headstrong girl, with no trace of anger for the state of her less than proper appearance.

"Why don't you ask Kat, you know how she loves these things?", She replied.

The woman merely laughed. "I see you enjoyed yourself."

"Couldn't have been more delighted to attend."

"Always the life of the party, I see." Buckingham smiled kindly at the girl she had raised as if she was her own daughter.

"Goodnight, and thank you waiting up. It's nice to see at least one friendly face." Cameron said, before turning and ascending one of the many grand staircases present throughout the castle.


	36. Chapter 36

Hey guys! I'M BACK!

So I have a new story up, it's called "Mask of a Princess". Ya'll should check it out. It is different and interesting, and not at all written like this story was. So please, do me a solid and read it! It would a ton!

Love,

Breann!


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